Hundreds of years before the Romans invaded Britain the Parisi tribe (Arras culture) in East Yorkshire had built a network of roads. They used consummate metal working skills with iron and bronze to manufacture high speed chariots for travelling between their villages on highways cut into the chalk countryside.

Recently archaeologists made a stunning discovery of an upright Iron Age Chariot complete with horses and rider in the town of Pocklington – 17 miles from the village of Duggleby with its famous Neolithic Round Barrow.

When Dr Alice Roberts featured the find on her BBC programme she described the chariot as the Iron Age equivalent of a cross between a fast sports car and a military tank. For this reason I have christened it ‘The Pocklington Iron age Ferrari‘. Actually naming it after an Italian high performance car is a little ironic because this find together with other local Iron Age discoveries have cast doubt on the idea perpetuated by the Romans that their British opponents were a band of uncivilised, primitive barbarians.

Regular visitors to ChrisDuggleby.com will be aware of my interest in the Duggleby family history and our strong links to the area around the Duggleby Village in East Yorkshire (for more info see my Duggleby History page – link here). A few years ago I published a global Duggleby family tree (link here) dating back to Sir Henry Duggleby (born mid 12th century). Several Dugglebys mentioned in the tree have lived in Pocklington (17 miles from Duggleby village).

Pocklinton also played a key role in Duggleby history because Chancery Inquisitions made there in 1246  and 1282 mentioned Adam de Diuelkeby and Adam de Dugelby (spelling of Duggleby was a bit fluid in those days). These together with Ecclesiastical Land Transactions mentioning grants of land from wealthy Dugglebys to the Bridlington Priory helped elucidate early parts (12th & 13th Century) of the family tree (more detailed info in my article here).

So the news of a stunning archaeological site in this part of East Yorkshire caught my attention. Duggleby village is already home to Duggleby Howe, the largest prehistoric round barrow (burial mound) in Britain dating from around 3000 BC (similar age to Stonehenge). If you are interested in more detail about Duggleby Howe and its excavations check out the article by Alex Gibson using the link here (the first bit is in French – the English description starts at paragraph 10 – lots of pics!).

What I particularly like about the excavations in Pocklington is that they uncover a period between the Neolithic burial site at Duggleby Howe (ca. 5000 years old) and the records of Duggleby (Difgelibi) in the Domesday book  (dated 1086) and the early parts of the Duggleby family tree (with Sir Henri ca 1150). The Iron Age Chariot is over 2000 years old.

So what was so unusual about this chariot to ensure it featured in a BBC archaeology programme (Digging For Britain: Iron Age Revealed)? After all there have been 25 stone age burial chariots found in Britain – 23 in East Yorkshire alone! Well take a look at the following photo taken during the excavation:

This chariot was found near to an iron age cemetery involving 74 square barrows and over 164 skeletons (info from Current Archaeology using the link here). It was part of two barrows which the experts described as ‘most impressive, with no British parallel’. The smaller of these was round and contained a young man, 17-25 years old, buried with a spear. His remains indicate he had experienced violence during his life, perhaps in battle, many years prior to his death (two nose fractures – fully healed before his death).

It was the larger square barrow at the site that contained the Iron Age Ferrari driven by what was clearly a ‘high-status individual‘.  He is believed to have been over 46 when he died and therefore lived longer than most others in his community. The skeleton shows no signs of weapons injury. Unlike the other chariot burials in the UK this one was buried complete and attached to two upright horses. The rider was found lying in the chariot positioned on top of a well-preserved bronze covered shield. He also had a highly decorated brooch (but no weapons).

Nearly all of the other chariots found in Britain were dismantled with the wheels laid flat – this one, however, was ‘ready to go‘. The two pony skeletons were also positioned upright ready to lead the chariot out of the grave. In order to get them into this unique position they were probably ‘well tried, tested and trusted’ ponies that were led down into the burial site and harnessed up to the chariot before having their throats cut. To preserve them in this upright position the burial area must have been quickly back-filled as soon as they were killed.

The wheels of the chariot had iron ‘tyres’ surrounding a (decomposed) wooden frame. Changes in the soil colour indicated where the wheel spokes had been. The hub at the end of the wheel axle was surrounded by an ornate bronze band. Although they were over 2000 years old the iron tyres were still complete and had been forged as continuous rings of iron. Clearly these ancient Brits had consummate metal working skills well before the arrival of the Romans.

Another interesting feature of Iron Age East Yorkshire has been identified using aerial archaeology techniques. These have uncovered track-ways along the ground in which the local width of the ruts cut into the chalk match the axle width of the stone age burial chariot. These stone age road ways were probably cut out of the topsoil to reveal the underlying chalk which provided an excellent all weather surface for driving. It therefore appears that the invading Romans were not the first to introduce roads into Britain. These track-ways are believed to have preceded the Romans by several hundred years.

Lots of the local iron age communities were connected by these track-ways indicating the existence of an intricate network of chariot based transport. Close analysis of the bones of the fingers of the man placed on this upright chariot indicate swellings where the tendons would have been attached. Such swollen areas are indicative of the bone growth caused by increased use of the area in question – consistent with someone ‘experienced in handling horse reins’. This points to the fact that this person was indeed a ‘charioteer‘.

A further indication of the status of the individual found with the chariot were the remains of 6 suckling pigs. In fact an iron age meat hook was still attached to some of the ribs indicating that this may have been used to throw an offering to the dead pilot straight from the grill. Normally we would expect the pigs to be fattened before slaughter so the use of tender juvenile animals is a further indication of the man’s status and the wealth of the community seeing him off.

If you would like to see how such a chariot would have looked in action here is a short video based on a ride in a reconstructed vehicle (Acknowledgements to Dr Alice Roberts for risking life and limb as she impersonates Boudica ‘Queen of the Brits‘ – Courtesy of the BBC):

If you found this article interesting please visit the ChrisDuggleby.com site again (Followers always welcome).

Chris Duggleby (Proudly born in East Yorkshire!)

I am indebted in this review to the contributions (information, visuals and dedicated archaeological work) of MAP Archeaeological Practice Ltd (Based in Malton, MD Paula Ware), the BBC, the Current Archaeology Journal, the Pocklington Post and several other on-line resources.

Do you sometimes wake up with a headache, pains around your eyes, sinusitis – and haven’t even had a drink?

It just might be your undies (or your partner’s).

Textile Allergens can be inhaled while you sleep – Here’s a case study based on a seemingly harmless item of underwear.

Regular visitors to my blog will know that I am particularly interested in allergies – especially the ones we don’t normally expect. The high level of interest in my article on deadly detergents (check out the link Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners) has alerted me to the fact that many people worry about allergic reactions to clothes or the chemicals in them.

Therefore let me share with you my recent experience involving the classical symptoms of sinusitis. I had these symptoms for about 5 days – including head-aches and pains around the sinuses (cheeks, nose and eyes) and other nauseous feelings that might commonly be associated with a hang-over. Like a hangover the symptoms were worse when I woke up in the morning and my sleep was disturbed.

At around day 3 I presumed I had simply picked up some bug and that the immune cells in my sinuses were leading the battle to neutralise the infection and rid my body of it. The symptoms I experienced were mainly due to localised inflammation as my body mobilised its defences against what I thought was a seasonal pathogen. As it was winter I felt this was a reasonable assumption.

However one thing made me suspicious that my medical diagnosis (sourced mainly from Google) may not be the full story. I did not have a blocked-up or runny nose, chest pains, cough or tickly throat and I was not running a high fever. If a bug had caused my sinusitis I would have expected these kind of symptoms as my body tried to flush the little microbes out of my tubes. Generally cold and flu bugs do not like raised temperatures – that is why our immune systems have evolved the fever response . This puts the microbes at a disadvantage while our white blood cells try to nobble them.

So on day 5 as I awoke with another crashing head-ache (and still not having had any booze) I noticed that the T-shirt I had been wearing in bed smelled of perfume. This was one of the T-shirts I that I had washed in the days when I used to use washing detergents. Blog followers will know that some years ago I stopped using detergents in my washing machine (the link above has the gruesome details that explain this life style change). However, before this change, I used to conscientiously wash my clothes in Persil, hang them up to dry, iron and fold them into nice piles for storage in airtight containers.

Last week I sorted out some ‘fresh’ T-shirts ready to use in bed. As my normal stock was depleted I took a suitable ‘old-stock’ T-shirt out of its airtight container and hung it on a hanger in my bedroom. I didn’t actually wear the T-shirt until 4 days later. This item of clothing had been hanging in my bedroom since precisely the time that my sinusitis symptoms started.

It gradually became clear that I was being poisoned by my T-shirt! On morning 5 I quickly placed the T-shirt into a sealed container ready to be washed. Within an hour or so of removing the culprit all sinusitis symptoms cleared up. No head ache, no aching eyes and I started to smile again.

In recent years I realised that I have an allergy to one or more of the additives used in washing detergents (or softeners). This showed itself through allergic contact dermatitis (Pics of affected body parts in the blog referred to above). Following this realisation I started washing in pure, detergent free, water (from a salt based water softener). This seems to have removed, or at least diluted, whatever I was allergic to and my symptoms disappeared. Water at 60C appeared sufficient to get rid of any nasty bugs or smells and I follow a ‘stain minimisation strategy’ to avoid any unsightly accidents. So I do not wear white shirts when applying dark balsamic vinegar to my salad (no I have not started buying brown underpants!).

Occasionally an item slips through from my old ‘detergent washing’ days and if it spends a night in the bedroom with me I usually pay dearly. One night I was convinced I had contracted flu – until I remembered that I had changed the bed-sheets the day before (old ‘detergent washed’ stock!).

What surprised me with this latest sinusitis incident was that the only item involved was a contaminated t-shirt hanging in my bedroom. This was sufficient to give me symptoms for at least 5 days – symptoms which subsided during the daytime (when I was out of the bedroom) and returned with a vengeance the following night. It really was like having a recurring hangover for 5 days. I suspect that I have become more sensitive to whatever causes these allergic responses because I have been so successful in eliminating detergents from my environment.

A key ‘warning signal’ for me is whether an item of clothing or linen has a perfumed smell. Now when I unpack any item of clothing from my storage boxes I give it a quick smell test. If I can smell perfume it goes into the washing machine (water only) before being worn. This can lead to some interesting situations – If you insist on smelling the undies of any potential partners before you sleep with them it can come across as a little unorthodox!

Something else to look out for is second hand clothes. Many of us are keen to encourage recycling and I went through a period of buying used Levi’s on E-bay. The supplier was anxious to let me know they had been washed and when they arrived I was knocked back by the smell of perfume. Even without my allergy they would have stayed in the washing machine long enough to eliminate that smell! So if you do use second hand clothes it is a good idea to wash them thoroughly to remove any contaminants.

One of the main reasons for sharing this information with you is to highlight that it is not only allergic contact dermatitis that you need to be aware of when coming into contact with textiles. You may also, like me, find that you react through inhalation. This is particularly possible if you dry your washing inside your home. As this example shows I am even sensitive to a small, single contaminated item after it has been dried, aired, and stored for several years.

I realise that I have been experiencing these inhalation based allergic reactions throughout my life. I now understand why I often became ill on the first night staying in a hotel or with friends and family (all situations which normally involve recently cleaned bed linen). These days I avoid these problems by not sleeping around – it is a bit much to expect people to provide linen that has only been washed in pure water (and just try turning up for a date with your own bed linen!).

These kind of allergic reactions are not only caused by detergent products. Many new clothes have chemicals added to them to make them appear brighter (especially white products) or to improve their processing or reduce wrinkles (like formaldehyde). Here is a link to a list from Greenpeace – Hazardous Chemicals in Clothing (it includes Alkylphenols, Phthalates, Brominated/Chlorinated Flame Retardants, Azo Dyes, Organotin Compounds, Perfluorinated Chemicals, Chlorobenzenes, Chlorinated Solvents, Chlorophenols, Short-chain Chlorinated Paraffins and Heavy Metals).

If you want to share similar experiences/tips of your own with other readers please use the comments box below. If you are concerned about confidentiality simply adopt a neutral name and avoid mentioning anything that could identify you (e-mail addresses are not published). In this way, others can benefit from your comments and it makes it easier for me (and others) to reply to you on the website. If you follow this website you will get updates as they happen.

So next time you wake up with a hangover – check whether there is something nearby that smells of perfume!

Chris Duggleby

Public Crab Attack Scare – Take Care Sleeping in Berlin – Do Not Catch Crabs – Two Year Prison Sentence: One of Germany’s most popular tourist areas is threatened by infestation with “Alien Crabs“. However many people do not appreciate that that under German law if you catch crabs you could find yourself faced with a hefty fine or up to two years in prison. More below…

I was staggered to read in the German national press this morning that Berlin is threatened with being ‘overrun by alien crabs‘. Tourists take note: if you find yourself a nice park bench for a rest – you may find you are not alone. The country that prides itself in maintaining order and setting tough hygiene standards is somewhat embarrassed that this infestation has taken hold. What’s worse for the locals is that the species involved is not a native of Germany – this alien vermin originates from America.

Before I go on let me make one point of clarification. You may have landed on this page because you were searching for ‘Pubic Crabs‘ – those nasty little insects that like to inhabit pubic hairs and other parts of the human body. However, my focus today is on a different kind of creature – actually a much bigger one – the ‘Public Crab‘. Should you find one of these crawling through your genital hairs you would be well advised to remove it very quickly before it does some serious harm with its large, nasty, chopping claws.

To minimise confusion I have included above some pics of pubic lice happily co-existing with a host in their normal habitat. There is no need to worry about these little chums castrating your private equipment – they just want to suck your blood and lay eggs. If pubic lice is your area of interest your time has not been wasted – you can quickly jump (sorry!) to my other recent article about a high tech German invention: the Plasma Nit comb. If your would like to find out more about this development from the famous Fraunhofer Nit-research Institute just click on the article title or on the nitcomb picture below:

“Kill Head Lice In A Day With The Newly Developed Plasma Nitcomb From The German Fraunhofer Institute“

For those readers who are less interested in pubic infestations but would like to learn more about Berlin’s current public infestation read on. Why is the German national press creating hysteria with headlines about the Alien Swamp Crab (“Sumpfkrebs”) Invasion of Berlin? Well – parts of this iconic capital city are being overrun by bright red American crustaceans. These aliens were recently spotted walking around the streets near the Spanish embassy – presumably flushed out of their cosy underground lair by a summer shower.

These migrants are known is the US as a variety of Crayfish (Latin name Procambarus clarkii) – a culinary favourite in that part of the world known as “the Louisiana Crawfish“. Its natural habitat is normally the Southern US States and northern Mexico (Could this explain the preference for the Spanish embassy?).  It has a very pronounced bright red colour and can grow to be quite large (15 cm). It is this colourful appearance that makes it a favourite among those Berlin residents who like to keep an aquarium.

One of the problems is that in the comfortable, protected environment of a German domestic aquarium crayfish can live for about 5 years. As they get bigger some owners find their size can overwhelm the rest of the ‘exhibits’. Alternatively they may just get bored with looking at the same crustacean for 5 years. So their ‘pet’ Sumpfkrebs may get relegated to the garden pond or be accidentally mislaid during a walkies in the local park. Once freed of their celibate imprisonment these passionate creatures are, unsurprisingly, desperate for a bit of sexual adventure.

As crayfish are able to mate several times a year it is not surprising that their numbers in Berlin have been increasing rapidly. The last couple of mild winters will have prolonged the time available for passionate pursuits – clearly re-enforcing Berlin’s reputation as a sexually adventurous city. Despite Angela Merkel’s open door policy welcoming migrants I understand the Berlin authorities are starting to worry about this foreign invasion. These crustaceans have a very diverse appetite and it will not be long before local fish stocks (and lots of other sensitive local delicacies) become seriously diminished.

Interestingly I noticed am article in the International Journal of Biological Science  reporting that Procambarus clarkii, our promiscuous crayfish, can actually reproduce without having to even bother with sex (Yue et. al. Discovery of four natural clones in a crayfish species Procambarus clarkii. Int J Biol Sci 2008; 4(5):279-282). The research team identified a number of natural genetic clones of the crayfish – indicating that these offspring were produced by a mother that hadn’t had to endure sex (Presumably when you have ten legs – performing sexual acts can be a bit of a challenge!). For any ‘scientists’ who are interest you can find the original crayfish sex article using the link here.

By the way – the picture above is not the result of feral crayfish having a wild night of sexual fun in Berlin. It illustrates one of the ways that our friends in the US keep their crayfish numbers under control – they eat them.  Just in case anybody in Berlin sees this and thinks the local infestation presents an interesting opportunity for a tasty crawfish supper – be warned. Under my assessment of German law (OK, admittedly I am not a lawyer) catching these little creatures is considered to be ‘fishing’. If you do not have the appropriate fishing licence from the authorities any attempt to catch the crustaceans can be punishable with a hefty fine and up to two years imprisonment. Is it really worth it?

Who knows? If you do go get incarcerated in a Berlin prison you might be lucky enough to enjoy an intimate relationship with that other kind of crab! (so don’t forget your plasma nit comb).

Happy scratching!

Chris Duggleby.

If you are interested in reading my other health focused articles try the following

Torture In The Shower – Face and Body Soap Allergies – Main Suspect: Pears Transparent Soap

Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

Is Alzheimer’s caused by the Gum Disease Bacterium P. Gingivalis – A Dementia Prevention/Treatment Breakthrough?

Toxic Chemicals in Sex Toys – 18 Vibrators, Cock Rings, Love Balls Tested – Only 3 Get All Clear

My T-shirt Made Me Sick – Textile Allergies – Sinusitis From Your Underwear

Ladies Shop Till You Drop – Leave Your Man in a Husband Parking Pod – The Capsule Hotel Idea for Bored Shoppers. If you get pissed off with the man in your life always complaining that shopping takes too long here’s a new innovation that will keep you both happy – the Husband Parking Facility – Coming to a shopping centre near you. Read on…

While you read on why not listen to my album ‘Electro Baroque‘ (all tracks are also available on iTunes using the link here)? Classical music using modern instruments:

or if you prefer to listen to my electronic music album ‘Studio Valiumm‘ here are the videos (also on iTunes using the link here):

More info about my music is at the dedicated website www.TRANSFORMATES.com

When I lived in Tokyo in the 1980’s I had to pop down to Osaka regularly on the bullet train to meet my customers there. In those days my fellow Salary-men spoke excitedly about the new Capsule Hotel that opened in Osaka in 1979 – this facility allowed gentlemen to sleep in comfortable little pods for a fraction of the price of a Japanese hotel.

Now scroll forward nearly 4 decades and our Asian friends have come up with another innovation to help ease the life of those tired husbands. This new development has already been introduced to a couple of shopping centres in Shanghai including the prestigious Global Harbour Mall in the Putuo district. It has been described locally as a husband parking bay (although I like to think of it as a ‘Hubby Play-pod‘).

The cabins have been developed by the company Ingrem Technology. Their manager, Mr Wei Pengfei, explained that market research had shown that although most people go shopping in ‘pairs’ usually the men are the first to become bored with the experience. When this happens their wife (or girlfriend) can drop them off at the Hubby Play-pod (at the time of writing their are four of these facilities in the Global Harbour Shopping Mall).

Inside the pod is a comfortable sports seat which also provides a personal massage facility. The parked ‘guest’ can make use of the computer games on offer within the play-pod. Currently the facilities are free but the demand has been very strong with some gentlemen being left there for several hours by their partners. The plan is to start charging for the service in the near future.

Mr Wei Pengfei explained that interest is growing rapidly with enquiries from a further ten clients under consideration. The plan is to equip the next generation of Hubby-pods with air conditioning (it gets very warm in Shanghai in the summer months). Charges will be introduced based on the amount of time a guest spends inside the pod.

And how is the feedback about the Hubby-pod experience? Mr Wei explained that generally the men have found the experience very enjoyable – their appetite for going shopping with their partners appears to have increased. However the ladies responses were more mixed. Li Ting, a 35 year old stay-at-home mother from Shanghai, told the China News (CNS):  “I think it’s a creative way for my husband to take a break from shopping, which men are often not interested in. It’s totally fine if he plays games there for half an hour while I’m trying on dresses and I don’t need his opinions.”

By contrast Ding Wen, a 29 year old primary school teacher, considered it unacceptable to see her husband sitting there playing computer games if he chose to go out with her for a date:  “Whether it was a decade ago when we started a love relationship or it’s now when we already have a three-year-old son, I always believe we should take the quality time we spend together seriously,”

Mr Wei explained that although most ladies support his development some women like to try on and show their husbands or boyfriends the clothes they are interested in. It should be noted however that the pods do have glass walls so theoretically the man could look at his wife from inside of the pod. Some other ladies were unhappy because they had finished with their shopping but then struggled to get their man out of the pod  – apparently he was having such a good time.

By the way if you do go to Osaka in Japan and want to check out the original pod hotel there the English language website to the Capsule Inn Hotel Osaka is here (This is not a recommendation or endorsement – just for info as a piece of Japanese cultural history). Clearly this could be the next development in the evolution of the Hubby shopping pod – don’t just go shopping with him for a couple of hours – put him in a pod hotel and spend the whole weekend shopping (but make sure you keep the credit cards ladies!).

Enjoy the Weekend!

Chris Duggleby.

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports on similar subjects.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun related articles:

8th Mar 2017: Nano Chip Cock Ring Detects STIs – Size, Thrust, and Speed – From Penis via Smartphone to Facebook

28th Feb 2017: Vaccinations Cause Children to Masturbate – Public Frustration At Austrian Article:

16th Oct 2016: How to Prevent Smelly Trumps – Scientific Breakthrough in Australia – Good Carbs Mean Good Farts 

9th March 2016: Penis Ring Emergency – German Fire Fighters Rescue Man From Painful 13 Cock Ring Torture: Vorsprung durch Technik and erectile dysfunction

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

some here is some more serious stuff:

12th June 2016 Hospital Serial Killer – Super Bugs Created With Jumping Genes During Bacterial Sex

21st May 2016 Skin Cancer and Cataracts From Your Car – Poor UV Side Protection – Windows Tested From 15 Vehicle Makers

19th April 2016 Torture In The Shower – Face and Body Soap Allergies – Main Suspect: Pears Transparent Soap

3rd March 2016 Using Gene Drives To Change Mosquito Sex In Fight Against Zika, Dengue and Malaria

3rd Feb 2016 Zika Infection Spread By Sex In Dallas – Earlier Sexual Transmission In Colorado – Detailed Symptoms 

31st Jan 2016  Bed Bugs – Insecticide Resistance – Arbovirus Transmission – Zika and Microcephy

13th Jan 2016 Kill Head Lice In A Day With The Newly Developed Plasma Nitcomb From The German Fraunhofer Institute

26th July 2015 Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

 

 

 

 

 

Stabbing Pain in Chest – Doctor Finds Dental Brace in Gut – After 10 years in Bowel – Orthodontic Abdominal Piercing. A women in Australia could not remember having swallowed anything unusual but acute pains in her lower abdomen revealed the horrific consequences of an unknown ingestion over 10 years earlier (Report contains explicit medical photographs).

This week BMJ Case Reports (BMJ – formerly the British Medical Journal) published a report in which Dr Talia Shepherd described an unusual discovery in a female patient with severe abdominal pain.

While you read on why not listen to my album ‘Electro Baroque‘ (all tracks are also available on iTunes using the link here)? Classical music using modern instruments:

or if you prefer to listen to my electronic music album ‘Studio Valiumm‘ here are the videos (also on iTunes using the link here):

More info about my music is at the dedicated website www.TRANSFORMATES.com

Initially when the patient visited the hospital her medical adviser thought the problem was related to her gall bladder. They were able to alleviate the pain and send the woman home. She returned to the hospital two days later in absolute agony. The pain was so extreme that the doctor decided to give her a CT scan. This uncovered a long thin object which appeared to be embedded in her small intestine (see photo of CT scan).

Initially the physician thought this might be a fish bone – it had pierced the small bowel in several places causing the intestine to turn in on itself and prevented its normal movement – a condition known as Volvulus. If left untreated this can restrict blood flow to the area, eventually leading to the death and decay of this vital organ. A decision was made to open up the patient immediately to determine the exact cause of the damage and hopefully identify an appropriate course of action. The photo below shows what the medical team found when they opened up the woman’s abdomen (Medical photos: kind acknowledgements to BMJ Case Studies and Dr Talia Shepherd).

The piercing of the small intestine and the origin of the Volvulus was not a fish bone but a 7 cm piece of wire from an orthodontic brace.

What was particularly unusual about this finding was that it was 10 years since this 30 year old Australian lady had last worn a brace. She could not recall ever ingesting or losing part of her brace. The doctor assumed that the piece of metal had been sitting in the woman’s intestine for at least 10 years. It had only caused considerable pain recently, presumably when it pierced the woman’s small bowel.

It is very unusual for a piece of orthodontic brace to be swallowed and lead to serious problems in the gut. A few years ago doctors on Basel (Switzerland) identified what looked like a frog on the X-ray of a seven year old child’s throat. It turned out to be a frog shaped pendant that the child had swallowed and was removed by endoscopy under anaesthetic (see below for link to this and related X-ray pics).

Coins are among the most common metal objects swallowed by children although the slide show provided via the link below includes a number of less common articles found in the gut including (as well as the frog) a fork, a ring, and a spring. Tongue piercings pose a significant risk of accidental swallowing. One particularly dangerous group of items frequently swallowed by young children are small ‘button’ shaped batteries. These can leak dangerous chemicals into the gut and can also cause damage (‘burning’) due to their ability to generate an electric current. The link to the X-ray slide show with some of these unusual items found in the gut can be found here. (The slide show has been put together by the Sueddeutschezeitung, a national German newspaper)

 

If you do swallow something that gives you cause for concern (or someone you knows does – like a child) seek medical advice as quickly as possible. Enjoy your lunch (but swallow carefully)!

Chris Duggleby.

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports on similar subjects.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun related articles:

8th Mar 2017: Nano Chip Cock Ring Detects STIs – Size, Thrust, and Speed – From Penis via Smartphone to Facebook

28th Feb 2017: Vaccinations Cause Children to Masturbate – Public Frustration At Austrian Article:

16th Oct 2016: How to Prevent Smelly Trumps – Scientific Breakthrough in Australia – Good Carbs Mean Good Farts 

9th March 2016: Penis Ring Emergency – German Fire Fighters Rescue Man From Painful 13 Cock Ring Torture: Vorsprung durch Technik and erectile dysfunction

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

some here is some more serious stuff:

12th June 2016 Hospital Serial Killer – Super Bugs Created With Jumping Genes During Bacterial Sex

21st May 2016 Skin Cancer and Cataracts From Your Car – Poor UV Side Protection – Windows Tested From 15 Vehicle Makers

19th April 2016 Torture In The Shower – Face and Body Soap Allergies – Main Suspect: Pears Transparent Soap

3rd March 2016 Using Gene Drives To Change Mosquito Sex In Fight Against Zika, Dengue and Malaria

3rd Feb 2016 Zika Infection Spread By Sex In Dallas – Earlier Sexual Transmission In Colorado – Detailed Symptoms 

31st Jan 2016  Bed Bugs – Insecticide Resistance – Arbovirus Transmission – Zika and Microcephy

13th Jan 2016 Kill Head Lice In A Day With The Newly Developed Plasma Nitcomb From The German Fraunhofer Institute

26th July 2015 Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

Legal Battle of Pensioner Who Massaged His Bottom Over Public Hot Tub Jet at Baths. A 79 Year old retired engineer found himself explaining how frequently he had erections to a lady prosecutor in a German court following an unfortunate wardrobe malfunction incident over a hot tub water jet at the local baths. More below…

While you read why not listen to my album ‘Electro Baroque‘ (all tracks are also available on iTunes using the link here)? Classical music using modern instruments:

or if you prefer to listen to my electronic music album ‘Studio Valiumm‘ here are the videos (also on iTunes using the link here):

More info about my music is at the dedicated website www.TRANSFORMATES.com

Just to set the record straight – this story is not autobiographical! Generally speaking we Brits tend to be a bit old fashioned when we go to the swimming baths. We don’t encourage some of the ‘clothing optional‘ bathing habits of our European neighbours – especially in our public baths – like the one in the photo below. The Germans on the other hand invented FKK or Freikörperkultur – which roughly translated means Free Body Culture (or for those readers in the North of England ‘getting your togs off in public’).

Considering how liberal our German friends are I was rather surprised to come across an article in their National Press this morning that illustrated a somewhat more ‘sensitive‘ picture. The Süddeutschezeitung (somewhere between the ‘Times’ and the ‘Guardian’ in its standing as a respectable newspaper) reported in graphic detail how a pensioner had to appear in court under a charge that his swimming trunks had slipped down at the local baths. Goodness knows how they would deal with the visible anal cleavage displayed by many English construction workers.

The incident appeared in the Phoenix Bad (“Bath”) in Ottobrunn, part of the delightful state of Bavaria. Among its many attractions these facilities boast a sauna (special ‘men only’ on Monday mornings) and spa (link to the Phoenix Bad site). Upon further investigation I discovered that the gentleman, Mr Karl K…, suffered the misfortune that his trunks unexpectedly slipped down while standing in the pool next to a “massage jet”. Herr K…. suffered with his sciatic nerve and found that his regular visits to the pool with its massage jets helped to ease his pain – he is 89 years of age (see photo in this Link to TZ Newspaper Article ‘Pensioner accused of being exhibitionist’)

Herr K…. was called before the court because a 60 year old fellow swimmer believed she had seen something ‘unsightly‘ in the bubbling water in front of the man. The lady made this observation while doing a handstand in the water wearing her swimming goggles (from the original court text: “Wobei eine Dame, die gerade einen Unterwasserhandstand absolvierte, durch ihre Schwimmbrille ‘was rumschwimmen’ hat sehen“). The lady further explained that the man had a very enjoyable relaxed expression on his face (“Dabei hatte er so einen entspannten Gesichtsausdruck“).

In the TZ article Mr K…. explained that he had been married three times and was now a widow. He did not have a criminal record and had worked all his life as an engineer. He had been a regular visitor to the pool for 27 years and kept fit by swimming a couple of lengths followed by a ‘session’ with the massage jets. Perhaps this had ‘dislodged’ his trunks? He would then relax by lying on one of the beds. This helped him with his sciatic pain. It was during such a process that a lady observed him exposing himself and raised a charge against him. She later withdrew the charge upon discovering his age but the German prosecutor decided it was in the best interest of the public to continue with the case.

As a result the pensioner, supported by his walking stick and lawyer, had to appear before the local court.  He was accused of taking down his swimming trunks and ‘playing around’ (“an sich herumgespielt“). He explained that perhaps the water jets caused his trunks to slip down but you would really have to look closely to see anything because of the bubbling water.

His defence lawyer, Mr Wilfried Sydow, then decided to get straight to the point and asked him whether he was still capable of getting an erection? (apparently the witness claimed to have seen this before withdrawing her charge). He explained that he could not – the last time he had experienced such a development was 5 or 6 years ago.  The prosecutor pronounced that due to the ‘legal complexities’ involved she would stand the case down upon payment by the accused of €500 to a women’s charity organisation.

Mr K…. is permitted to resume his visits to the swimming baths but the prosecutor strongly advised him to keep his trunks on at all times in order to avoid any further ‘misunderstandings’.

Once again the ChrisDuggleby.com site cuts through the Fake News to bring to you matters of international importance as reported by the European national press. Many readers will be considering a holiday in Germany this year so please be warned not to take the liberal reputation of the locals for granted. Although some places will accept nude bathing it is important to understand that this is not generally the case – transgressions can lead to legal proceedings.

I, for one, intend to install some extra strong knicker elastic into my swimming trunks before my next trip to Bavaria!

If in doubt be modest!

Chris Duggleby

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports on similar subjects.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun related articles:

8th Mar 2017: Nano Chip Cock Ring Detects STIs – Size, Thrust, and Speed – From Penis via Smartphone to Facebook

28th Feb 2017: Vaccinations Cause Children to Masturbate – Public Frustration At Austrian Article:

16th Oct 2016: How to Prevent Smelly Trumps – Scientific Breakthrough in Australia – Good Carbs Mean Good Farts 

9th March 2016: Penis Ring Emergency – German Fire Fighters Rescue Man From Painful 13 Cock Ring Torture: Vorsprung durch Technik and erectile dysfunction

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

some here is some more serious stuff:

12th June 2016 Hospital Serial Killer – Super Bugs Created With Jumping Genes During Bacterial Sex

21st May 2016 Skin Cancer and Cataracts From Your Car – Poor UV Side Protection – Windows Tested From 15 Vehicle Makers

19th April 2016 Torture In The Shower – Face and Body Soap Allergies – Main Suspect: Pears Transparent Soap

3rd March 2016 Using Gene Drives To Change Mosquito Sex In Fight Against Zika, Dengue and Malaria

3rd Feb 2016 Zika Infection Spread By Sex In Dallas – Earlier Sexual Transmission In Colorado – Detailed Symptoms 

31st Jan 2016  Bed Bugs – Insecticide Resistance – Arbovirus Transmission – Zika and Microcephy

13th Jan 2016 Kill Head Lice In A Day With The Newly Developed Plasma Nitcomb From The German Fraunhofer Institute

26th July 2015 Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

 

Kissing Sores – Mouth Ulcers after Brushing Teeth – Mum Stops Using Colgate – Blisters Disappear. If you suffer from recurrent mouth ulcers (canker sores) you may need to look more closely at the ingredients in your toothpaste – specifically Sodium Lauryl Sulphate is a cheap detergent many manufacturers add to make their toothpaste ‘froth’ in your mouth. More details below…. 

I recently popped up to the North of England to celebrate my Mother’s birthday and over cake we got on to talking about health issues. She told me that she had recently stopped using her favourite toothpaste (Colgate) because she had read that it can cause mouth sores.

She had suffered from recurring mouth ulcers for many years and had never thought it might be related to the toothpaste she had used all her life. Then she discovered that an ingredient in Colgate toothpaste called Sodium Lauryl Sulphate (SLS) can lead to something called Recurrent Aphthous Ulcers also known as Canker Sores or Mouth Ulcers.

My mother changed her toothpaste to one that was sodium lauryl sulphate free and she no longer suffers from recurring mouth ulcers.

As I have also been a life-long user of Colgate (recommended by Mum!) I decided to do some research and check out why manufacturers use sodium lauryl sulphate. I was rather disappointed to discover that this ingredient does not really contribute to the hygiene of my mouth – it is added as a kind of marketing gimmick. It actually causes the toothpaste to froth up in your mouth so you think it is helping to clean up the ‘nasties’. It is this ability to cause a froth which also makes it a popular ingredient in shampoos.

So what is Sodium lauryl sulphate or SLS? It is a cheap anionic surfactant – which means it can help oily things to mix with water. In other words it is a detergent and a popular cheap ingredient in cosmetics (helps remove oil from your skin) and as a household cleansing agent (for greasy kitchen floors). This is the stuff that Colgate-Palmolive (and other makers of SLS containing toothpaste) recommend you put into your mouth at least twice a day.

As well as creating the frothy feel when you clean your teeth SLS can also strip away the natural protective lining of your mouth. Your body’s surface cells secrete oily substances to protect the mouth and other surfaces from bacteria – these oily secretions contain natural chemicals which can attack harmful microbes. These protective substances are washed away by the detergent action of SLS (in the froth) – it also attacks the protective cells lining the surface of the mouth. This opens the door to bugs and ulcers.

Like my mother I will now be looking to replace Colgate as my preferred toothpaste with an SLS-free alternative. Manufacturers have a number of tricks to hide unwanted chemicals when listing ingredients on their packaging. For example sodium lauryl sulphate (SLS) can also be described using a number of other names like those below:

• A13-00356
• Akyposal SDS
• Aquarex Methyl
• Dodecyl sodium sulphate
• Lauryl sodium sulphate
• Monododecyl ester
• Monododecyl ester sodium salt sulphuric acid
• Sodium dodecyl sulphate
• Sodium laurylsulphate
• Sulphuric acid monododecyl ester sodium salt

(note: in the US the ‘ph’ in sulpher/sulphate/sulphuric is replaced with an ‘f’)

As a postscript I should also mention that there are other causes of sores in a person’s mouth. For example, it is possible to contract Herpes virus sores by oral sex (and other close contact with a carrier’s bodily fluids). However it is quite possible that brushing with an SLS containing toothpaste may reduce you mouth’s natural protective barriers to such infectious agents. Therefore I recommend you check with your medical adviser whether it is appropriate to use an SLS containing toothpaste prior to oral sex.

Health tip of the week: The froth in your mouth is not necessarily good for oral hygiene.

Safe brushing!

Chris Duggleby 

The Author is not professionally qualified to give medical advice – if you have any concerns about sores, toothpaste or oral sex please consult your dentist or doctor.

You can read more about SLS and mouth ulcers from the US National Library of Medicine/National Institutes of Health using the articles here and here.

If you are interested in reading my other health focused articles try the following

Torture In The Shower – Face and Body Soap Allergies – Main Suspect: Pears Transparent Soap

Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

Is Alzheimer’s caused by the Gum Disease Bacterium P. Gingivalis – A Dementia Prevention/Treatment Breakthrough?

Toxic Chemicals in Sex Toys – 18 Vibrators, Cock Rings, Love Balls Tested – Only 3 Get All Clear

My T-shirt Made Me Sick – Textile Allergies – Sinusitis From Your Underwear

Sensational Images of Blazing Cape Town Mountain – Hout Bay Fires moving towards Llandudno Engulf Sandy Bay: It is not everyday that you find yourself living next to a mountain that is on fire. This happened to me yesterday in Cape Town and this report explains what happened using high definition photography to capture some stunning views as the events unfolded. Links to my other similar photographic blogs are also included.

While you read why not listen to my album ‘Electro Baroque‘ (all tracks are also available on iTunes using the link here)? Classical music using modern instruments:

or if you prefer to listen to my electronic music album ‘Studio Valiumm‘ here are the videos (also on iTunes using the link here):

More info about my music is at the dedicated website www.TRANSFORMATES.com

I had hoped my earlier report about the heroic exploits of the Cape Town fire-fighting crews battling against flames around Hout Bay would be my last on that subject (see my detailed report with pics here).  Sadly I was proven wrong when explosions in the informal settlement at Imizamo Yethu in Hout Bay (known as Mandela Park) started fires that destroyed an estimated 1000 homes. Figures vary but this disaster is believed to have made around 4000 people homeless.

Between Hout Bay and my roof-top apartment in Llandudno is a rather large mountain – the Karbonkelberg. Very dry vegetation caused by the current drought conditions helped the Hout Bay fires in my previous report to reach my side (the Llandundo side) of the mountain. Fortunately when this happened over a week ago helicopter-borne fire-fighting crews quickly brought the bush fires under control. They were helped by very calm weather conditions followed by some much needed rain a couple of days later.

These fortunate climatic conditions were not in evidence at the time of the explosions this Saturday (11th March 2017). The wind helped the flames to spread rapidly and it was difficult to use helicopters because of both the wind and the risk of injuring people – including firefighters on the ground. The wind was predicted to get even stronger during the day and although the fires were brought under control the bush ignited again towards the evening.

My suspicions arose just before dawn on Sunday 12th March as I tried to take Moon-set photos of the full moon over Sunset Rocks (Llandudno). The moon was a deep red colour and this is often an indication of pollution – particularly that caused by large bush fires. As the moon set and the sun rose I could see smoke billowing over the Karbonkelberg mountain from the direction of Hout Bay. The wind was predicted to reach 100 km an hour (which you really feel on the Cape coast) and the large, well known, Cape Town Cycle Tour (formerly known as Cape Argus) had to be called off.

The winds made it impossible for the chopper crews to perform their dousing magic on the mountain bush fires and it was only a matter of time before flames started to engulf the Sandy Bay/Llandudno side of the Karbonkelberg. They continued to spread round the mountain towards the Sandy Bay beach area as the day progressed (see pictures – click on them for high definition views).

By nightfall the whole of this side of the mountain was engulfed in flames. Ours is one of the first Llandudno properties bordering the Table Mountain National Park where Karbonkelberg is situated. We needed to start preparing ourselves for a potential evacuation. If you have never seen a mountain on fire at night time the pictures here will illustrate how it can be both awe-inspiring and at the same time very frightening – especially if you live next door to it.

In the evening the authorities had placed road blocks at Fishermans Hook – the only road leading to our part of Llandudno (the ‘Sunset Rocks’ area). This was to prevent ‘sightseers’ from blocking the roads in case they were needed for emergency services or residents evacuating in a hurry. Fortunately we didn’t need to evacuate.

The pictures presented above were taken at 9:30 pm. I continued to monitor the flames throughout the night (my regular ‘comfort’ trips during the night provided me with useful ‘mountain viewing’ opportunities). As the night progressed the flames subsided and the spreading appeared to be limited by a fortuitous ‘natural firebreak‘. This was due to a long stretch of sand dunes that reaches from Sandy Bay beach all the way to the town of Hout Bay.

In the past bush fires with larger flames have managed to cross-over this gap but the vegetation has changed in recent years making this less likely. Earlier fires had cleared the area of much larger ‘Alien’ plants and replaced them with the smaller indigenous Fynbos shrubs that are endemic to this part of the Cape.

By the time the sun was just about to rise on Monday 13th March (today) I was up again trying to catch the full moon setting over the rocks in front of my apartment.

Today there was not the red colouration I had witnessed the previous morning – as the sun rose I could see the mountain had stopped burning apart from an occasional ‘pre-breakfast’ smoke. The pictures here illustrate how the fire has caused most of the green vegetation to be replaced by grey, charred remains. I understand however that these shrubs are very hardy and their evolution has been closely intertwined with bush fires – the indigenous vegetation of the area should regenerate before too long.

Fortunately on this side of the mountain no homes were destroyed – sadly this was not the case for about 1000 shacks on Hout Bay side. However I understand the authorities, acknowledging that this is a disaster area, will provide funding to ensure more secure accommodation can replace the shacks. The challenge is on for the authorities to help regenerate the homes long before nature regenerates the vegetation.

Thanks for visiting ChrisDuggleby.com.

Chris Duggleby

Here are some other reports I have prepared on similar themes:

27th Feb 2017: Mountain Bush Fires in Cape Town as Firefighting Choppers Cool Karbonkelberg’s Flames

5th Mar 2017: Cape Town Whale Spotting Tips – Secret Bait – Sandy Bay Beach Excitement as Big Willy Comes

28th Jan 2017: Release of Chris Duggleby’s new Album ‘Studio Valiumm’ and Scenic Prostitution of Cape Town

14th Jan 2016: Exploring Coastal Caves on the Western Cape of South Africa

27th Nov 2015: Whales Jumping to Bach, Moon Porn Exhibition and Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD)

19th Mar 2015: Photos of Girls Diving From Sandy Bay Rocks – Cape Towns Nudist Beach – Local Boys Caught Playing Allegris Miserere

8th Mar 2015: Full Moon Pictures from Sunset Rocks near Cape Town – English and German Urine Developments – Hallelujah!

29th Mar 2013: Ship wrecks (and other old wrecks) on the rocks near Sandy Bay, Cape Town

17th Mar 2013: Sunset from the top of Table Mountain following an exciting canine adventure by Cable Car

17th Dec 2012: Looking for wild (and almost ferocious) animals near Chapmans Peak

14th Apr 2012: Searching for Cannibals in Woking, Surrey, England

Cling Film Condom Gets Stuck – i.Con the Smart Wearable Sex Ring in Beta Testing: This week I would like to share with you how my over-enthusiasm for developing new applications for plastics additives almost caused a condom disaster in ‘Accident and Emergency‘. I also provide a quick update on the beta testing for the new nano-packed, downloadable smart condom i.Con and discuss how it could warn you about syphilis and chlamydia.

As I am getting on a bit I think now is the time to come clean about some of the secrets from my early career in developing new chemical products. Last week I described my job in making mutants and their role in the UK’s erection of the year (more on that in the link here). Well, following my attempts to make mutants of the bacterium ‘Psodomy‘ I decided it was time for a career change and moved into additives for plastics and rubber.

In my new role, working for the UK’s largest Oil company, I was responsible for sales and development of these products in the South of England. One of the products was a very viscous (= ‘like treacle’) product that was also quite tacky (= ‘sticky’) called Polybutene. These properties made it useful in things like sealants and adhesives (because of the stickiness) and high performance motor oils (as a viscosity index improver). It was also used in cling film (plastic- or cling-wrap) as the ingredient that made it ‘cling’.

Although I had already earned some street cred with the blokes at the pub with my stories about helping to develop Formula 1 motor oils – clearly for the girls I needed something a bit more sensual. My sales region included the well known ‘London Rubber Company‘ whose major product ‘Durex‘ was famous among all my friends. I decided to see if I could use my Polybutenes’ skills to develop the perfect condom for this potential client.

Anyone who has had the good fortune to use a condom will appreciate that something you do not want it to do is fall off in the middle of use. I realised that my tacky additive could be just the product to help this rubber wearable item ‘stay on’. Clearly we had the technology – I already sold to one of the UK’s largest producers of cling film. One potential problem with our polybutene was that its viscosity (thickness) reduced when it was exposed to increased ‘shear‘ (e.g. rubbing against it). This was actually a desirable property in some products – like adhesives – it would help you to adjust the surfaces you were trying to stick before the joint was fixed.

In a condom we didn’t want the stickiness to reduce as you increase the shear rate because this would make it easier for the sleeve to ‘come off’ during action. However we had a special ‘2000’ grade that was super thick and I was certain that if you put this into the condom material it would not slip off. Yes I was on the brink off producing the ‘condom that never falls off‘. Chris’s solution to the problem of global over population.

Field trials were a natural next stage. However we did run into a snag – as well as being very thick our 2000 grade was also the most tacky product in the range. Great if you are making glue or rodent traps! A condom containing this additive would certainly not come off during action – however, it had a slight drawback. After you have finished your period of ‘passion’ it was impossible to remove the condom from your appendage. My manager pointed out to me the potential brand damage to Durex of having lines of people at the hospital ‘Accident and Emergency‘ departments – all with condoms stuck on their Willies.

Shortly after this the oil company sent me to become their Sales Manager in Japan – a country where we did not have any existing customers. It was felt that my enthusiasm for innovative product development would be less damaging there (…remind me, one day, to explain how I nearly developed the chop-stick that will stick to rice – sadly it also stuck to diners’ lips).

i.Con the Smart Condom (Ring)

Recently, I was reminded of my early days in condom research, when I heard about another new UK sex innovation. The company ‘British Condoms’ has developed a smart wearable penis ring that you place over a condom. This nanochip based smart device measures loads of useful data to help you analyse your sexual performance. As part of a holistic exercise regime it could help to keep you fit and even lose weight (it measures calories expended in sex).

The product is currently undergoing beta testing to develop its systems for analysing and counting the type and number of positions you use. It should also be able to measure STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections) like Chlamydia and Syphilis although I am not sure quite how it will tell you about this (I suspect it will be too small for a loudspeaker…just imagine the scene – passions arise and a little voice shouts out: ‘Don’t touch her she’s got pox!‘).

Perhaps your STI information, like the other stats, can be downloaded straight to your smart phone to share on Facebook? Rather than duplicate my in-depth evaluation of this new smart product here why don’t you take a look at my detailed review of this exciting new product on the page using the link here).

I wonder if they have ever considered developing a cock ring that is a bit more sticky and doesn’t slide off? Better polish off my C.V.!!! Sadly some gentlemen are so worried about rings slipping off that they actually use more than one on their penis (for my article about how the German fire brigade carries out training to practice removing such devices – in one case 13 on one Willy – use the link here).

So that is enough for today’s action packed ‘health-special’ edition of the blog. If you are interested in such exciting reports like this one you might like to subscribe to my blog – yes it is free!).

Chris Duggleby

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports on similar subjects.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun related articles:

8th Mar 2017: Nano Chip Cock Ring Detects STIs – Size, Thrust, and Speed – From Penis via Smartphone to Facebook

28th Feb 2017: Vaccinations Cause Children to Masturbate – Public Frustration At Austrian Article:

16th Oct 2016: How to Prevent Smelly Trumps – Scientific Breakthrough in Australia – Good Carbs Mean Good Farts 

9th March 2016: Penis Ring Emergency – German Fire Fighters Rescue Man From Painful 13 Cock Ring Torture: Vorsprung durch Technik and erectile dysfunction

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

some here is some more serious stuff:

12th June 2016 Hospital Serial Killer – Super Bugs Created With Jumping Genes During Bacterial Sex

21st May 2016 Skin Cancer and Cataracts From Your Car – Poor UV Side Protection – Windows Tested From 15 Vehicle Makers

19th April 2016 Torture In The Shower – Face and Body Soap Allergies – Main Suspect: Pears Transparent Soap

3rd March 2016 Using Gene Drives To Change Mosquito Sex In Fight Against Zika, Dengue and Malaria

3rd Feb 2016 Zika Infection Spread By Sex In Dallas – Earlier Sexual Transmission In Colorado – Detailed Symptoms 

31st Jan 2016  Bed Bugs – Insecticide Resistance – Arbovirus Transmission – Zika and Microcephy

13th Jan 2016 Kill Head Lice In A Day With The Newly Developed Plasma Nitcomb From The German Fraunhofer Institute

26th July 2015 Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.