Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

Residents and property owners in Hamburg’s famous Reeperbahn (St. Pauli) district are pretty tired of people urinating on their walls and have decided to take matters into their own hands. The ingenious engineers have come up with an idea that returns the fluids back to the perpetrator so if you fancy having a tiddle in the Hamburg red light district you had better make sure you are wearing your Wellington boots!

Any house proud resident would be pretty annoyed if, over time, the pristine plaster of their property became discoloured yellow and was damp because it was constantly being used by tourists and alcohol-laden passers-by as a public urinal.

Reeperbahn Walls Urinate on Tourists and Drunken Passersby
Reeperbahn Walls Urinate on Tourists and Drunken Passersby

About 20 million tourists pass through the Hamburg district of St Pauli with its famous red light ‘entertainment’ opportunities each year. Clearly this is great news for the local bar owners and ‘entertainers’ but it is not much fun for the house proud locals who must regularly endure their properties being sprayed with urine when these tourists can’t make it to a proper public convenience. Generally speaking it is the gentlemen who are the perpetrators of this unpleasant ‘yellow splashing’.

Enough is enough! Julia Staron the Reeperbahn’s district manager who represents the interests of property owners and local commercial interests is now fighting back. The action campaign comes under the title “St. Pauli pinkelt zurück!” (Chris’s translation: ‘St Pauli is pissing back!‘).

Together with a team of crack scientists a special surface coating has been applied to strategically located ‘favourite’ pissing spots. The surface coating was developed for the marine industry and has a very special characteristic – once it is applied if a gentleman urinates on it – it sprays the wee-wee back at him. Hence the development team’s preference for wearing rubber boots.

Such high-tech products are not cheap – it can cost around €500 to cover a 6 square meter wall. Initial results however are promising – much more so than the current fine of €50 for anyone found transgressing in public.

Clearly other locations in which residents find their properties used as urinals will be watching this German application with interest.

Pee sprayers be warned!

“Don’t Piss Here! We Piss Back” – sign from the Hamburg Reeperbahn

Chris Duggleby

If you are interested in reading my other health focused articles try the following

Torture In The Shower – Face and Body Soap Allergies – Main Suspect: Pears Transparent Soap

Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

Is Alzheimer’s caused by the Gum Disease Bacterium P. Gingivalis – A Dementia Prevention/Treatment Breakthrough?

Toxic Chemicals in Sex Toys – 18 Vibrators, Cock Rings, Love Balls Tested – Only 3 Get All Clear

My T-shirt Made Me Sick – Textile Allergies – Sinusitis From Your Underwear

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