How can I stop Facebook sending me adverts I do not want or need?

How can I stop Facebook sending me adverts I do not want or need? We have all been there before – the person who gets adverts for cat food but doesn’t have a cat or the teenage boy who is bombarded by ads for incontinence panties. How does it happen and more to the point how can you stop it?

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

 

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

At this time of year many of us will have been having an on-line feeding frenzy – involving visiting sales sites for a whole range of diverse, and perhaps weird, Christmas presents. And then we have spent hours on social media sites like Facebook clicking thousands of likes against those ‘exciting’ photos our virtual friends have been posting to try and make up for forgetting to send them a personal greeting.

Jules Léotard modelling his sports outfit - please click 'like' to receive exciting hosiery adverts
Jules Léotard modelling his sports outfit – please click ‘like’ to receive exciting hosiery adverts

Well now it is payback time. The virtual big-brother, otherwise known as the Facebook algorithm, has been gathering lots of information about your ‘likes’. It has also been getting tonnes of juicy information from those on-line purchasing trips. It doesn’t matter that you didn’t intend to buy those frilly pink silk panties for yourself – the algorithm now has you marked-up as someone who has a potential interest in frilly pink silk panties and perhaps also a connoisseur of any of the other ‘exotic things on offer by the site you ‘innocently’ visited.

Did you click ‘like’ on that photo of a friend’s child playing in the nativity play with a plastic inflatable donkey? Well don’t be surprised if you start getting adverts for donkey food, or special offers for manure, or perhaps even animal themed inflatable ‘toys’. In fact the algorithm probably has enabled advertisers to combine your interest categories branding you as someone who likes dressing inflatable toys with frilly pink silk panties.

I learned the hard way that you have to be very careful before you click ‘like’. In the days when I was putting together my album of fun songs I experimented with different song titles and thumbnail photos to try and understand what influenced the viewer stats on YouTube. Interestingly two of my biggest YouTube hits at that time were my recordings of ‘Pretty Boy Sally‘ (about a gay cross dressing peasant boy who marries a eunuch) and Lycra Larry (about a scantily dressed jogger who accidentally exposes himself).

As a marketing exercise the success of these titles told me a lot about how to get attention on youTube. However I did not realise that by clicking ‘like’ against my own videos on Facebook I would be categorised for potential advertisers as a particularly interesting client (especially those producing Lycra based ‘dressing-up’ products).

If you also discover that you are getting the wrong kind of attention from advertisers on Facebook what can you do about it? Fortunately it it possible to veto any ‘categories’ into which you believe you have been incorrectly classified. The process is as follows:

  • At the top right hand corner of your Facebook page you should see a little arrow.
  • Click on the arrow and a menu appears.
  • Click on ‘Settings’.
  • A new menu opens and towards the bottom click where it says ‘Adverts’.
  • At the bottom of the next page click edit against ‘Adverts based on my Preferences’.
  • Then visit your Advert Preferences.
  • You will see a list of category groups with numbers against them.
  • Click on these groups and you will see the precise categories you have been classified under.
  • By placing your mouse over a category an ‘X’ appears at the end of the line which you can click on to remove the category.

By following this process you will not reduce the number of adverts you receive – you can simply eliminate some of the more useless (or perhaps embarrassing) categories. In fact you can even help advertisers to identify where your interests lie by adding some categories of your own. To do this go to the box at the top of the page and click against ‘Browse’. Then select categories that are more to your preference.

By the way – if the Facebook algorithm happens to read this educational article please note that based on the ‘Choir girl’ video below I should be categorised as a ‘devoutly religious person’ (at my age I need a few extra brownie points upstairs)

Happy clicking!

Chris Duggleby.

Be careful how your Facebook likes are interpreted
Be careful how your Facebook likes are interpreted

Now prepare for an uplifting experience! 

 

Young Boy Steals From Vatican – Pope Lenient

These days we are constantly hearing about cyber crime and how the perpetrators are getting more sophisticated. Many of these criminals are also very young and some of the crimes reflect a growing belief among the young that intellectual property like publications and music should be freely available for all. Internet based file sharing sites are a typical example of this phenomenon.

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

 

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

In this week’s article I would like to share with you a story of intellectual property theft that goes right to the heart of the Catholic church. In fact even by producing this article and sharing with you the details of this intellectual property I myself could face the threat of excommunication. The property was stolen from the Vatican. This crime was not committed by some modern day computer whiz-kid – in fact it was perpetrated 245 years ago (1770) by a fourteen year old.

One of the first international intellectual property thieves
One of the first international intellectual property thieves

This young boy was not some starving waif stealing so that he could buy his next crust of stale bread. He was a rather well-to-do Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.

Every Holy Week the Sistine Chapel in Rome performed a wonderful piece of choral music by the composer Gregorio Allegri (1582-1652). It was forbidden by the Catholic church to transcribe this music and the piece could only be performed in the services specified by the church. Writing it down or performing the piece outside of these services was punishable by excommunication.

Gregorio Allegri 1582 - 1652: Composer of 'Miserere'
Gregorio Allegri 1582 – 1652: Composer of ‘Miserere’

During the holy week of 1770 Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart visited the Sistine Chapel in Rome with his father and heard this uplifting piece of music: the ‘Miserere‘. Later he wrote down the music from memory, visiting the chapel one more time in order to make any necessary corrections. After about three months he was summoned back to Rome by Pope Clement XIV. Fortunately for the young composer rather than excommunicating him the Pope praised him for his talent and awarded him the order of the Golden Spur (a kind of papal knighthood).

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart wearing the Order of the Golden Spur awarded to him by Pope Clement XIV
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart wearing the Order of the Golden Spur awarded to him by Pope Clement XIV

To celebrate this early example of ‘free’ music sharing for the masses I have prepared a new video to accompany my own version of Miserere. Please accept it as a token of my good wishes during this festive period.

You will notice that my own arrangement of this remarkable (four centuries old!) piece of music features some digital choir boys. However I am very much aware that we live in an inclusive society and it would be remiss of me to only feature the boys in this celebratory article. In fact I am also aware that not all of my readers are avid fans of classical music. Therefore I have also prepared another more modern piece of music (I think Techno is the term given by the younger folk to this thrusting stuff). Rather than boys this somewhat newer composition gives greater prominence to the choir girls and also makes use of some slightly more mature gospel singers (to maintain the ‘religious’ thread).

Here is the video for my latest techno composition ‘Choir Girls: Turn Me On‘)

I hope you find at least one of these pieces of music to your taste (if not please take a strong drink and try listening again!). Enjoy the festive period and thanks for keeping in touch with me via ChrisDuggleby.com. If, in the aftermath of the celebrations, you do find yourself feeling a bit down why not pop onto the internet and listen to some of that free music – and perhaps remember to pay homage to the audacity of that 14 year old boy who believed good music should be enjoyed by the masses.

Chris Duggleby.

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart 1756 - 1791 from Chris Dugglebys festive article on Vatican Crime
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart 1756 – 1791 from Chris Dugglebys festive article on Vatican Crime

Street Art on the M25 – Techno Storm over Africa

Surrey Street Art – on the M25 Motorway – and Psychedelic Art Accompanies Techno Storm over Africa: This week I will share with you some of the risks artists go to in order to make the M25 look pretty (including pics of the artist at work). I will also explain how to download a free copy of ‘Techno Storm over Africa‘ – so you can enjoy the uplifting, pulsating, rhythm in the privacy of your own bathroom!

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

Art Studio Rather Inconveniently Positioned under the M25 Motorway
Art Studio Rather Inconveniently Positioned under the M25 Motorway

This weeks article has a distinctly ‘modern (psychadelic) art‘ flavour to it – so if you prefer classical music simply please swap over quickly to one of my earlier articles like the ones here (Vivaldi) and here (Bach). Let me start with that rather exciting ‘TECHNO‘ storm. Here is the video for Techno Storm Over Africa:

As you will have noticed I have used some spiffing computer graphic art to accompany this rather uplifting little techno number. It was inspired, written and recorded in my studio here in Africa – hence the title. There is a shot of the location of the studio at the end of the video which I think you will agree is likely to inspire even the most dull person (did I tell you I used to be an auditor!).

If you would like to take advantage of my special offer of the free MP3 download just follow the instructions on the special FREE MP3 page here.

The Studio based in Table Mountain National Park as the storm subsides
The Studio based in Table Mountain National Park just as the storm subsides

Now, moving on from my musical activities in Africa to the street art in the English county of Surrey. Regular visitors to ChrisDuggleby.com will be familiar with the picturesque photos from my walks around the Surrey countryside (if you missed it – the link to last week’s canal-boat adventures with some pretty chicks is here). On one of my recent walks along the local waterways I came across a gentleman artist who was using, as his canvas, the M25 Motorway:

M25 Street Artist using environmentally freindly recyclable canvas
M25 Street Artist using environmentally friendly recyclable canvas

You may well ask ‘how is it that Chris is walking along the Surrey waterways and bumps into the M25?‘. Well, at the point where the Basingstoke canal meets the River Wey Navigation System they both also intersect with the M25 motorway. To avoid the cars getting wet this section of the motorway has been sensibly built on stilts and it was to these support structures that the artist was giving a facelift.

As his pictures seemed to go well with the ‘psycho’ graphics used on my Techno Storm in Africa video I though they would also be a nice accompaniment to this week’s article. Considering this similarity of artistic output perhaps we are both on the same psychedelic drugs (in other words I am presuming the artist also likes very cheap red wine). So without further ado let me introduce you to some pictures of Surrey’s latest ‘street’ art (OK ‘Motorway’ art is probably a better descriptive term):

Street Art 1 on the M25
Street Art 1 on the M25
Street Art 2 on the M25
Street Art 2 on the M25
Street Art 3 on the M25
Street Art 3 on the M25
Street Art 4 on the M25
Street Art 4 on the M25
Street Art 5 on the M25
Street Art 5 on the M25
Street Art 6 on the M25
Street Art 6 on the M25
Street Art 7 on the M25
Street Art 7 on the M25
Street Art 8 on the M25
Street Art 8 on the M25
Street Art 9 on the M25
Street Art 9 on the M25

Actually the political statement on the last photo makes me think I may have been a little presumptuous in assuming the artist’s preferred drug was cheap red plonk (especially the Australian stuff I get in Germany for €1.99 a bottle). Although I didn’t check his credentials I assumed this artist was working for the local council as part of their motorway infrastructure renovation project. He probably thought I was doing a ‘time and motion‘ study for the local council’s audit department (…when taking pics I always find it’s useful to have a clipper-board on a string around my neck – it gets me into those more sensitive places without too many questions – an old auditor’s trick).

So I think that’s enough psychedelic art for one week. If for some reason my video didn’t quite uplift you as much as you wanted I suggest you take a good stiff drink or two and watch it again. I am currently working in the studio near Cape Town with my digital choirboys on the next uplifting techno number. Watch this space!

Chris Duggleby.

Street Artist at work, presumably for the local council, renovating the M25 near Woking
Street Artist at work, presumably for the local council, renovating the M25 near Woking

For new visitors to my site you may be interested in some other articles featuring Woking and the Surrey countryside. Here are a few examples:

Woking Walks – Part 2: Canal Boat Chick Gets Frisky, Chris’s Organ Gets a Good Plucking

Walking Round Woking – Part 1: River Wey, Newark Priory Ruins & 13th Century Royal Palace

Prehistoric Britain (or more precisely: Prehistoric Woking!)

Searching for Cannibals in Surrey

The beach where the Martian invaders landed

Newark Priory, near Woking inspires TRANSFORMATES’ ‘Rock the Priory’ (with Cannons)

English Countryside: Gallery

and of course some firework pics from Woking’s bonfire night display… here

In addition here are some of my other recent articles: Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun reports…

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

19th April 2014: German Police Catch Hedgehogs Testing Home Made Crash Helmets in Saarbrücken

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes,Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th March 2014: Germany and Finland Joint Investigation: New Case of Sexual Cannibalism Including Self-mutilation (Castration) During Intercourse.

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

…and here’s some more serious stuff

25th October 2015: Health Risks: Food allergy prevention – Latest research ‘feed infants early with allergenic food

17th October 2015: Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements help cancer cells become malignant – latest research from Texas

31st May 2015: German Concern about Potentially Carcinogenic Aromatic Hydrocarbons in Cosmetics  

11th May 2014: Product Development Risk: New Air Conditioning Coolant Gas Produces Carbonyl Difluoride (Highly Toxic – Related to WW1 Gas Phosgene) in Vehicle Fires

16th April 2014: Ethical Pricing: Same Drug – For Leukaemia 21 Euro(Now Withdrawn) – For Multiple Sclerosis 888 Euro

6th April 2014: Product Quality Risk: Shoes Sold On-line By Zalando Recalled Due To Chromium 6 Contamination – Known Allergen And Carcinogen

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

 

Woking Walks – Part 2: Canal Boat Chick Gets Frisky, Chris’s Organ Gets a Good Plucking

Woking Walks – Part 2: Canal Boat Chick Gets Frisky, Chris’s Organ Gets a Good Plucking……As property prices in London and south-east England continue to go through the roof this week’s article will show you a viable and very picturesque alternative –  accommodation on Surrey’s beautiful waterways (including pics of gorgeous birds). I will also explain what inspired me to get my organ out in Woking…including plucking – but with no strings attached.

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

Newark Priory near Woking, Surrey, - Inspiration for 'Rock the Priory' by Chris Dugglebys TRANSFORMATES 變 Music Project
Newark Priory near Woking, Surrey, – Inspiration for ‘Rock the Priory’ by Chris Duggleby’s TRANSFORMATES 變 Music Project

So let’s start with that inspiration. Regular visitors will probably remember that some of my music has been inspired by my treks through the Surrey countryside. For example Newark Priory in the photo above inspired my ‘Rock the Priory‘ (featuring cannons!) – for the original article about this with pictures of the Priory (A.D. 1190) here’s the link. And for those who have not yet downloaded the single here it is on iTunes and the video with priory pics is on YouTube here.

Not far from Newark Priory in the village of Pyrford is a small but very impressive Norman church, St. Nicholas, dating from A.D. 1140 (more info about its interesting history in the Newark Priory Link). Queen Elizabeth I is believed to have worshipped there and is rumoured to have donated a silver chalice to the church in 1570. Inside this church is a pipe organ which inspired me to add a classical pipe organ part to my Baroque Anthem (which is on the album here). Here are some photos of the church organ and its beautiful setting (just click on any of my pictures if you want to see them in high definition):

Interior view 1 of Norman Church St Nicholas (1140 AD) near Pyrford
Interior view 1 of Norman Church St Nicholas (1140 AD) near Pyrford
Interior view 2 Norman Church St Nicholas 1140 AD near Pyrford from Chris Dugglebys article on Surrey Walks DSCF6506 (2)
Interior view 2 of Norman Church St Nicholas (1140 AD) near Pyrford
Interior view 3 Norman Church St Nicholas 1140 AD near Pyrford from Chris Dugglebys article on Surrey Walks DSCF6489 (2)
Interior view 3 of Norman Church St Nicholas (1140 AD) near Pyrford
Interior view 4 Norman Church St Nicholas 1140 AD near Pyrford from Chris Dugglebys article on Surrey Walks DSCF6499 (2)
Interior view 4 of Norman Church St Nicholas (1140 AD) near Pyrford
Norman Church St Nicholas 1140 AD near Pyrford from Chris Dugglebys article on Surrey Walks DSCF6462 (2)
Norman Church St Nicholas (1140 AD) and some very old gravestones
Organ Pipes in Norman Church St Nicholas 1140 AD near Pyrford from Chris Dugglebys article on Surrey Walks DSCF6510 (2)
Organ Pipes in St Nicholas Church

In order for me to give live recitals I recently decided that I had to find a way of capturing the sound of a pipe organ in a more portable instrument. Ideally I wanted one I could strap round my neck so I could also pretend to be a rock guitarist. Here is where my AX shoulder synth came in. In the video below you can see me producing a new version of my Baroque Anthem using the AX to recreate a church organ sound at the beginning of the piece. Then during the recording I reset the instrument to produce a more modern keyboard sound and play some twiddly baroque type sequences.

Towards the end of the video I reset the instrument again to sound like a lead guitar which is more typical of a modern rock band. Yes I have never forgotten when I failed the audition as a guitarist with my first semi-pro band (but they did help me get my first set of key boards – 40 years ago!). So if you ever fancied sounding like a rock guitarist but don’t want to mess around with all those strings – just strap one of these things around your neck and give your organ a jolly good ‘plucking’. Here is the video:

It’s nice that my keyboard skills have reached the level that I do not need to add canon fire to the music to hide the bum notes!

Moving on swiftly… to the problems caused by over-inflation in the UK property market. Have you ever fancied living on the water, perhaps with a pub next door and surrounded by lots of pretty birds? Well if this is the life for you just come over to the River Wey Navigation System or the Basingstoke Canal and get yourself a nice little barge. In the report below I will introduce you to some of your new neighbours, as well as some rather beautiful chicks and the local refreshment facilities.

Let’s start with a picture of the Anchor Pub – my son Alex and I can verify the yumminess of their food – we enjoyed a very pleasant summer lunch there watching the boats go by. Why don’t you try their prized Steak & Ale pie (Gold Medal Winner EBLEX England’s Best Steak Pie 2015). This is their signature pie – braised British steak & velvety gravy made with their award-winning Tanglefoot beer, served with buttered mash and seasonal vegetables.

Canal Boat Refreshments at the Anchor on the Wey Navigation Waterway at Pyrford
Canal Boat Refreshments at the Anchor on the Wey Navigation Waterway at Pyrford

In addition to old English pubs you can also find some very old bridges as you travel along these waterways. If you have ever wondered what a 250 year old bridge looks like here is a photo:

Pigeon House Bridge 1763) on the Wey Navigation Waterways
Pigeon House Bridge (1763) on the River Wey Waterway
Pigeon House Bridge 1763 Sign
Pigeon House Bridge 1763 Sign

You can actually rent the barges on the River Wey Navigation system – a modest investment to test whether you are really the sort of person who likes life afloat. Here’s is a selection of some of the offerings:

Canal Boats on the River Wey Navigation Waterway
Canal Boats on the River Wey Navigation Waterway
Canal Boat in action on the river Wey Navigation Waterway
Canal Boat in action on the Wey Navigation System
Canal Boat Artwork on the River Wey Navigation Waterway
Artwork on the River Wey
Canal Boat with flowers on the River Wey Navigation Waterway
Canal Boat with flowers on the River Wey Navigation System

…and if your barge gets poorly there is even a local boat doctor to help you out…

Canal Boat Doctors on the River Wey Navigation Waterway
Canal Boat Doctors on the River Wey Navigation System

The River Wey Navigation system joins onto the Basingstoke Canal which passes through Woking town. I know this canal well because my previous UK apartment had a nice balcony overlooking the canal. The Basingstoke canal was originally built during the industrial revolution between 1789-1794 and has recently been restored to allow pleasant walks along its tow paths and of course it is possible to travel along the canal by barge.

Locks along the Basingstoke Canal
Locks along the Basingstoke Canal

 

Basingstoke Canal 1794 sign
Basingstoke Canal 1794 sign
Basingstoke Canal 1991 restoration plaque
Basingstoke Canal 1991 restoration plaque

Let me now introduce you to the accommodation solutions to help you overcome the expensive London property prices. Here is a selection of pictures of house boats – many of which are converted industrial barges – they are ‘parked’ along the canal, not far from Woking town centre (with trains to London running every few minutes – and a journey time of less than 30 minutes!).

Canal Boat Homes along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Homes along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 9 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 1 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 8 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 2 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 7 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 3 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 6 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 4 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 5 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 5 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 4 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 6 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 3 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 7 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 2 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 8 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 1 along the Basingstoke Canal
Canal Boat Home 9 along the Basingstoke Canal

Now, what about that frisky chick? Well as I was taking my photos of assorted water craft I felt what appeared to be something nibbling at my ankles – we do get a number of water rats around the waterways so I quickly focused my attention onto whatever it was that had taken a fancy to my tootsies. The picture below is of a gorgeous little chick who must have decided that I was its daddy.

Gorgeous chick takes a fancy to musicians ankles
Gorgeous chick takes a fancy to musician’s ankles

The chick was so young it had not developed the natural instinct to flee at speed whenever people and other unpleasant animals get too close. Soon Mummy duck came along and quickly guided her little baby back into the water where she ensured there was a safe distance between her offspring and the man holding the strange black thing with knobs on it.

Gorgeous chick and mummy go for a paddle along the Basingstoke canal
Gorgeous chick and mummy go for a paddle along the Basingstoke canal
Gorgeous chick having fun on the Basingstoke canal
Gorgeous chick having fun on the Basingstoke canal

Actually on that day I came across a number of other birds and their families as I took my pictures on the waterways. Here is a selection:

Birdlife 1 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 1 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 6 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 2 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 5 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 3 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 4 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 4 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 3 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 5 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 2 along the Basingstoke canal
Birdlife 6 along the Basingstoke canal

Isn’t life strange? Many of my friends back in England, who are enduring the onset of Winter, are dreaming of escaping to warm exotic locations by the sea. Here am I, enduring the sun on the coast of the western Cape of Africa writing exotic articles about life in Woking! Variety certainly is the spice of life. I wonder what I will be writing about next week.

Have fun…and look out for those chicks around your ankles!

Chris Duggleby

Gorgeous chick nibbles musician's ankles
Gorgeous chick nibbles musician’s ankles

For new visitors to my site you may be interested in some other articles featuring Woking and the Surrey countryside. Here are a few examples:

Walking Round Woking – Part 1: River Wey, Newark Priory Ruins & 13th Century Royal Palace

Prehistoric Britain (or more precisely: Prehistoric Woking!)

Searching for Cannibals in Surrey

The beach where the Martian invaders landed

Newark Priory, near Woking inspires TRANSFORMATES’ ‘Rock the Priory’ (with Cannons)

English Countryside: Gallery

and of course some firework pics from Woking’s bonfire night display… here

 

Whale Jumps to Bach – Moon Porn – Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD)

Whales Jumping to Bach, Moon Porn Exhibition and Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD) – In this week’s article I will describe a little more about my recent ‘Jamming with Bachvideo and explain what it did to the local whale population. I would also like to introduce you to the newest art form produced here in South Africa’s VALIUMM 3 studioMoon Porn. I will then describe for you some details of my rather disturbing medical ailment which mainly appears when there is a full moon. 

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

A whale splashing along to Chris Duggleby's Electro-baroque music at Sunset Rocks near Cape Town
A whale splashing along to Chris Duggleby’s Electro-baroque music at Sunset Rocks near Cape Town

Let’s start with the news about Johann Sebastian Bach – or more precisely about his newest band member ‘Yours Truly‘. Those of you who saw last week’s article will know that one of my hobbies is jamming along to baroque classics. Last week I did it with Vivaldi (you can see that article by using the link here). This week it is the turn of Bach’s famous organ classic the Toccata and Fugue in D minor – (or to be more precise Chris’s version written for strings and electric guitars – the old video for that piece is here).

Johann Sebastian Bach 1685 -1750
Johann Sebastian Bach 1685 -1750

Well, having transcribed the original work for string instruments I found myself jamming along to it using my latest keyboard (no I don’t have many friends!). Try to visualise the sad image – I listened to MY OWN album track in the living room (- commercial message: ‘it’s available on iTunes here‘ -) and then hung a keyboard around my neck and started playing along with myself. A rather subtle form of musical self abuse!

After many hours of improvising to this one tune my ‘jam‘ evolved into a new piece of music to accompany Bach’s original work. I like to think that it is something he might have written and played himself if only he had managed to find a shoulder strap for his organ.

Roland's AX Shoulder Synthesizer in the UK VALIUMM Studio
One of the reasons Chris is popular with the neighbours (Roland’s AX Shoulder Synth)

Prior to my departure from the UK over a week ago I recorded this new ‘jam’ track in my UK recording studio and filmed myself doing it (yes I have received therapy for this habit – but it didn’t seem to do much good). Upon arrival at my facilities near Cape Town I set about turning the newly recorded track and the associated film into a short video. This is where the whales became involved. As I was finalising the video and playing it through my loud speakers I looked out of the open studio window and noticed in the distance that there was a whale jumping out of the ocean and spouting water in time to the music.

Clearly this must be a good omen for my new baroque inspired masterpiece. Perhaps even Bach himself has been reincarnated as a whale!. I will include some of my whale pics below but first let me share with you the music which will probably now become a ‘must-have’ for ocean wild-life enthusiasts around the world. Don’t be surprised if they start playing it on whale spotting expeditions.

Although I live a somewhat reclusive existence I do seem to have a lot of whale friends who come to visit me at Sunset Rocks in the Table Mountain National Park. Here are some pictures of these music loving friends attending one of my open air events:

One of the many whale visitors to Sunset Rocks (Llandudno, Cape Town) hoping Chris will play one of his tunes
One of the many whale visitors to Sunset Rocks (Llandudno, Cape Town) hoping Chris will play one of his tunes
A second whale races to join his friend as they splash along to Chris Duggleby's music
A second whale races to join his friend as they splash along to Chris’s music
You will always find one whale who, once the classical music starts, thinks he's the conductor with his baton!
You will always find one whale who, once the classical music starts, thinks he’s the conductor with a baton!

Now let me introduce you tomoon porn. Regular visitors to this site will be familiar with my little full moon fetish (if you missed the background here are a couple of articles explaining this somewhat deviant behaviour – with graphic photoshere and here). Basically whenever there is a full moon I just can’t leave it alone. I have discussed this with my therapist but she explained that treatment for this condition is beyond the resources available under the UK’s National Health Service. She recommended I write to my local member of parliament.

So, to continue with the story, this week (yesterday to be precise) I was rudely awoken at about 4:00 a.m. by the full moon shining through my bedroom window.

Full moon Nov 2015 'blaring' through the bedroom window at Sunset Rocks (Next to the VALIUMM 3 Studio)
Full moon Nov 2015 ‘blaring’ through the bedroom window at Sunset Rocks (Next to the VALIUMM 3 Studio)

Anyway, I did my best to ignore it by wrapping my boxer shorts around my head and trying to go back to sleep. Sadly this didn’t work and when I next looked up I noticed a ship was passing underneath the moon. This I could not resist, I sprang out of bed, got my camera and started to click – all typical characteristics of a person with Obsessive Camera Disorder (known in medical circles as OCD).

To try and maintain an appearance of ‘normality’ (in case the neighbours were up) I returned with the camera back to my bed and did most of the clicking wrapped in my duvet. This is where the term ‘Moon Porn‘ was born – it signifies the explicit photographic products made by a person in his (or her) bed during a full moon. To illustrate this perversion here are some of the photographs which will feature in my first moon porn exhibition – all taken on 26th November 2015 at Sunset Rocks (Llandudno) in the Table Mountain National Park:

Moon Porn 1 - People with Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD) first find an excuse to start clicking - here it was a ship passing underneath a full moon
Moon Porn 1 – People with Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD) first find an excuse to start clicking – here it was a ship passing underneath a full moon
Moon Porn 2 - To try and 'appear' normal an Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD) patient like this one may take pictures from their bed
Moon Porn 2 – To try and ‘appear’ normal an Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD) patient like this one may take pictures from their bed (avoiding the attention of neighbours and local police)
Moon Porn 3 - A typical symptom of Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD) is that the sufferer can not stop clicking until the moon totally disappears from view
Moon Porn 3 – A typical symptom of Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD) is that the sufferer can not stop clicking until the moon totally disappears from view
Moon Porn 4 - At Sunset Rocks near Cape Town facilities are being established to provide a secure and supportive environment for people with Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD).
Moon Porn 4 – At Sunset Rocks – near Cape Town – facilities are being established to provide a secure and supportive environment for people with Obsessive Camera Disorder (OCD).

So I think that is enough excitement for this week. I hope you have enjoyed reading about baroque jam making, ocean wild-life concerts and art related medical ailments. Please do not hesitate if you have any comments or recommendations (despite my therapist’s conviction that encouragement is not the best approach!). Meanwhile I now need to get back to composing music and writing about risk management – surrounded by this inspiring African landscape. I hope my US visitors had a great Thanksgiving and wish everyone a joyous weekend.

Chris Duggleby

Location of Chris Duggleby's Valiumm 3 Recording Studio in Table Mountain National Park
Location of Chris Duggleby’s Valiumm 3 Recording Studio in Table Mountain National Park

 

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun reports…

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

19th April 2014: German Police Catch Hedgehogs Testing Home Made Crash Helmetsin Saarbrücken

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th March 2014: Germany and Finland Joint Investigation: New Case of Sexual Cannibalism Including Self-mutilation (Castration) During Intercourse.

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

…and here’s some more serious stuff…

25th October 2015: Health Risks: Food allergy prevention – Latest research ‘feed infants early with allergenic food

17th October 2015: Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements help cancer cells become malignant – latest research from Texas

31st May 2015: German Concern about Potentially Carcinogenic Aromatic Hydrocarbons in Cosmetics  

11th May 2014: Product Development Risk: New Air Conditioning Coolant Gas Produces Carbonyl Difluoride (Highly Toxic – Related to WW1 Gas Phosgene) in Vehicle Fires

16th April 2014: Ethical Pricing: Same Drug – For Leukaemia 21 Euro(Now Withdrawn) – For Multiple Sclerosis 888 Euro

6th April 2014: Product Quality Risk: Shoes Sold On-line By Zalando Recalled Due To Chromium 6 Contamination – Known Allergen And Carcinogen

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

Live Vivaldi With an AX – Four Season Workover

In this week’s blog I want to try out something new. You may have noticed that none of my previous videos showed me playing any of the instruments I used – well that is about to change. Here I am using the AX (Roland’s shoulder synthesizer) to add a little spice to the electro-baroque version of Vivaldi’s Summer Concerto (part 3) that I included in my last album (‘Baroque Transformation‘).

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

If you have never seen a shoulder synthesizer before this is what it looks like:

Roland's AX Shoulder Synthesizer in the UK VALIUMM Studio
Roland’s AX Shoulder Synthesizer in Chris Duggleby’s UK VALIUMM Studio

One of the special characteristics of this model, making it different to other keyboards you hang around your neck, is that it actually has a pretty sophisticated synthesizer built into it. Earlier models were simply keyboard ‘controllers’ which needed to be hooked upto a computer with a built-in digital synthesizer to make their sounds. The AX does not need the computer. You can simply plug it into an amplifier on stage, very much like a guitar, and away you go.

The reason I have computers and screens in the picture above is because this is the equipment I use in my UK studio (VALIUMM 1) for making recordings. The displays are showing my Digital Audio Workstation or DAW software (for techies: I am using here Cakewalk’s SONAR X3 Producer DAW with a Roland Octa capture high-speed USB Audio Interface). The video below shows me adding a new AX Synth track to my earlier recording of Vivaldi’s Summer Concerto (this ‘backing track’ was included in my Baroque Transformation album which is now available via i-Tunes).

The Album Baroque Transformation part of Chris Duggleby's TRANSFORMATES 變 Music Project
The Album Baroque Transformation part of Chris Duggleby’s TRANSFORMATES 變 Music Project

I decided to invest in an AX Synth earlier in the year when my incapacitation with a nasty skin allergy prevented me from playing (gruesome pictures of various bits of my body are in the article here). As I was unable to move about much I had plenty of time to contemplate and realised that it would be rather difficult to perform most of my music live. The problem was that typically each track used between 15-25 instruments and it would be a bit expensive to take another 15-25 musicians out with me on the road. Some artists get around this problem by simply playing recordings of their work from the stage whilst fiddling (or pretending to fiddle) with a few knobs or faders and occasionally waving their arms in the air to remind the audiences that they are in fact alive.

I wanted to be able to actually play since this, for me, is the fun part of making music. So I decided to write some new tunes which I could play ‘over’ my original baroque pieces. These new tunes are original compositions by yours truly but designed to blend in with, and add a new dimension to, my earlier recordings. The earlier recordings all faithfully followed the music scores of the original baroque composers like Vivaldi or Bach but I had rearranged them to be played on modern instruments. The new tracks are totally new compositions – in fact they started off by me simply ‘jamming’ to my own earlier recordings (I know it’s sad isn’t it – he really should get out and meet girls!). Eventually the ‘jam’ matured into the pieces you can see in my videos.

Chris Duggleby 'jamming' to an electro-baroque piece with the Roland AX Synth in his VALIUMM 1 studio
Chris Duggleby ‘jamming’ to an electro-baroque piece with the Roland AX Synth in his VALIUMM 1 studio

I worked quite intensely during the last couple of months to get 3 of these ‘new’ live tracks ready. When you see the videos you will realise that my rather rusty old fingers needed a little practice to get upto speed and to be able to get through each recording from beginning to end without dropping a note. I prefer to record in this way because I feel it gets closer to what you would see in a live performance. The downside is that you may spot some mistakes but it means every recording will be unique (and is not ‘quantised’: an approach musical techies love in which they fix bum notes and timing mistakes in recordings using digital software – this may be a reason why much modern music is starting to sound similar and rather sterile).

The reason I was under pressure was that I needed to get the AX recordings completed before departing to Cape Town where my studio facilities are slightly more modest. I have two AXes in my German and UK studios but a third one for Africa would have bust the budget (and they are a bit too big for hand luggage). Now I have arrived at my pad in the Table Mountain national park I can finish off this work and share the videos with you. This activity is being supported by some much needed wet weather around Cape Town (but with the occasional rainbow – see the photo below that I took from my balcony this morning).

Rainbow over Sunset Rocks, Table Mountain National Park, where the VALIUMM 3 studio is located
Rainbow over Sunset Rocks, Table Mountain National Park, where the VALIUMM 3 studio is located

The first of the three new videos is now ready to share with you. In this I have taken the Vivaldi Summer Concerto recording I made earlier and played over this the AX Synth part. So if you heard the original recording you will notice this playing in the background (a simpler video for this earlier recording without the AX can be found on YouTube here). For the new video I am playing the AX in its pure lead synthesizer mode but modifying the notes using an electronic tremolo effect (this is what my left hand is doing while the right hand plays the twiddly bits on the keyboard).

Here it is. I hope you enjoy it and will try and share more videos with you in the coming days. Meanwhile greetings from a rather wet South Africa.

Chris Duggleby

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun reports…

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

19th April 2014: German Police Catch Hedgehogs Testing Home Made Crash Helmetsin Saarbrücken

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th March 2014: Germany and Finland Joint Investigation: New Case of Sexual Cannibalism Including Self-mutilation (Castration) During Intercourse.

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

…and here’s some more serious stuff…

25th October 2015: Health Risks: Food allergy prevention – Latest research ‘feed infants early with allergenic food

17th October 2015: Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements help cancer cells become malignant – latest research from Texas

31st May 2015: German Concern about Potentially Carcinogenic Aromatic Hydrocarbons in Cosmetics  

11th May 2014: Product Development Risk: New Air Conditioning Coolant Gas Produces Carbonyl Difluoride (Highly Toxic – Related to WW1 Gas Phosgene) in Vehicle Fires

16th April 2014: Ethical Pricing: Same Drug – For Leukaemia 21 Euro(Now Withdrawn) – For Multiple Sclerosis 888 Euro

6th April 2014: Product Quality Risk: Shoes Sold On-line By Zalando Recalled Due To Chromium 6 Contamination – Known Allergen And Carcinogen

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

Woking celebrates England’s most notorious terrorist by lighting up the Surrey skies

November is an interesting time to be in the UK. This is the period when all of England embarks on a massive celebration of the time when a Yorkshire ‘terrorist’ very nearly destroyed the houses of parliament with explosives. In order to help people fully appreciate the dangers involved in the incident many of the shops sell family sized packs of explosives which invariably lead to hundreds of burns and other injuries – often to small children. In addition thousands of pets and wild animals are scared out of their wits by the millions of explosions and flashes during the nights leading up to this great anniversary.

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

1 Guy Fawkes Celebration Fireworks - 2015
1 Guy Fawkes Celebration Fireworks – 2015

Not wanting to be left out of this cultural high spot I checked out the time of a rather large celebratory event about half a mile from my living room and loaded myself with lots of chocolate and red wine in anticipation of some visual excitement. The event in question was the annual Woking Firework Display which took place in the town’s main park. As my apartment is about 12 storeys above the park I tend to get a pretty impressive birds eye view of the fireworks without having to leave my sofa. Fortunately I was able to get a few photographs of the fireworks before the wine took effect.

2 Woking Guy Fawkes Celebration Fireworks- 2015
2 Woking Guy Fawkes Celebration Fireworks- 2015

To help set the scene here is a  picture of my ship shaped apartment block. I live on the south end which allows me to enjoy the fireworks stretching across most of the south Surrey countryside.

Rather high base used to capture the firework extravaganza in Woking Park
Rather high base used to capture the firework extravaganza in Woking Park
Chris's lounge view over the Surrey countryside (taken earlier in the year to avoid contamination by red wine and chocolate)
Chris’s lounge view over the Surrey countryside (taken earlier in the year to avoid contamination by red wine and chocolate)

Fortunately the weather was very mild on this evening (7th November 2015) so I was able to open the windows without risk of hypothermia. This enabled me, in addition to the visual treat, to be able to enjoy the Star Wars theme and Adele’s James Bond ditty bellowing out from the loud speaker systems in the park below. Any poor animals in the park that had not already died of fright due to the explosions probably ended up with tinnitus!

In case you missed your own local terrorist remembrance display here is a selection of my pictures of the evening. To enhance your pleasure why not also listen to my baroque interpretations play list on YouTube  – just click on the box below:

 3 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0641 (2) 5 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0627 (2) 6 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0606 (2) 7 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0621 (2) 8 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0634 (2) 9 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0648 (2) 10 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0603 (2) 11 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0598 (2) 12 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0652 (2) 13 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0623 (2) 14 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0673 (2) 15 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0607 (2) 17 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0604 (2) 18 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0628 (2) 19 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0662 (2) 20 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0640 (2) 21 Woking Surrey UK 2015 Guy Fawkes Night Fireworks taken from Centrium Building by Chris Duggleby DSCF0663 (2)

Any non-Brits may wonder why we go to all this trouble to celebrate a former terrorist. Guy Fawkes was born in the town of York in 1570 and eventually became part of a catholic conspiracy to blow up the then houses of parliament by placing explosives in the cellars. Suspicions were raised when catholic members of parliament received letters advising them that it would be in their best interest to stay away from work for a couple of days. King James got wind of this and on the 5th November (‘Bonfire night’) he had the cellers searched and found Guy Fawkes with a rather large amount of explosives and a long match.

King James ordered that Guy Fawkes be taken for a stretch in the Tower of London. In those days a ‘stretch’ in prison had a more literal connotation than today. Basically prisoners who required interrogation were often increased in length during the questioning process. This was because of the use of the rack which pulled their arms and legs in opposite directions. To fill in time they were often asked difficult questions during this stretching exercise. If they got the answers right the stretching would stop. At the end of the process they were given a confession to sign as a true and accurate statement of their answers to the questions. Although their arms and legs may have been torn out of their sockets many prisoners, like Guy Fawkes, still managed to sign the confession (although their writing was perhaps a little untidy).

The sentence given to Fawkes and his conspirators in 1606 required for them to be dragged along the ground across town behind a horse, to have their genitals cut off and burned before their eyes and then have their bowels and hearts cut out. The bits of their bodies were then to be displayed in the open air (to become “prey for the fowls of the air”) and were eventually distributed around the country to act as a disincentive to other potential conspirators. It would appear that guy himself (unlike his less lucky conspirators) managed to break his neck as he mounted the scaffold which meant that by dying he did not have to endure some of the more agonising elements of his punishment. The following picture depicts this first ‘Guy Fawkes’ celebration:

The execution of Guy Fawkes by Nicolaes Jansz Visscher
The execution of Guy Fawkes by Nicolaes Jansz Visscher

For new visitors to my site you may be interested in some other articles featuring Woking and the Surrey countryside. Here are a couple of examples:

Walking Round Woking – Part 1: River Wey, Newark Priory Ruins & 13th Century Royal Palace

Prehistoric Britain (or more precisely: Prehistoric Woking!)

Searching for Cannibals in Surrey

The beach where the Martian invaders landed

Newark Priory, near Woking inspires TRANSFORMATES’ ‘Rock the Priory’ (with Cannons)

English Countryside: Gallery

Enjoy the rest of Sunday and the forthcoming week (and please be sensitive to any animals that may still be on a state of shock).

Chris Duggleby

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun reports…

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

19th April 2014: German Police Catch Hedgehogs Testing Home Made Crash Helmets in Saarbrücken

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush andGenital Warts)

18th March 2014: Germany and Finland Joint Investigation: New Case of Sexual Cannibalism Including Self-mutilation (Castration) During Intercourse.

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

…and here’s some more serious stuff…

25th October 2015: Health Risks: Food allergy prevention – Latest research ‘feed infants early with allergenic food

17th October 2015: Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements help cancer cells become malignant – latest research from Texas

31st May 2015: German Concern about Potentially Carcinogenic Aromatic Hydrocarbons in Cosmetics  

11th May 2014: Product Development Risk: New Air Conditioning Coolant Gas Produces Carbonyl Difluoride (Highly Toxic – Related to WW1 Gas Phosgene) in Vehicle Fires

16th April 2014: Ethical Pricing: Same Drug – For Leukaemia 21 Euro(Now Withdrawn) – For Multiple Sclerosis 888 Euro

6th April 2014: Product Quality Risk: Shoes Sold On-line By Zalando Recalled Due To Chromium 6 Contamination – Known Allergen And Carcinogen

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine– The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

Sustainable Sex Setback- Multiple Orgasm Condoms Banned

The German Sustainable Condom Wars – Yesterday a court in Düsseldorf decided whether a marketer’s claim that their condoms corresponded to upto three orgasms each should be banned. Specifically the packs of 7 Eishorn (Unicorn) condoms declared that they were good for upto 21 orgasms. One of Eishorn’s competitors in the Fair and Sustainable German condom market, Fair Squared, took them to court due to the confusing nature of their marketing statements.

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

19th Century approach to testing condom marketing claims
19th Century approach to testing condom marketing claims

Regular visitors to ChrisDuggleby.com will know that I write reviews about serious risk management subjects. I also sometimes report on subjects that I have discovered in the Alpine press which are of a slightly less serious nature (but non-the-less true). I was therefore delighted today to come across an occurrence in Germany which serves as both a lesson in marketing risk and also has an element of fun (I am on a personal crusade to dislodge the global misconception that Germany does not have a sense humour). Hence today’s article about the German Sustainable Condom Wars.

Two Condom suppliers to the German market, Einhorn (in English ‘Unicorn‘) and Fair Squared both claim that their products are ‘Fair Trade‘ and ‘Sustainable‘. In fact Einhorn even claims that its condoms are Vegan. Yes their marketing approach has a somewhat humorous taste whereas Fair Squared take the subject of natural rubber based contraceptive products more seriously. Until recently Einhorn claimed on its packet of 7 condoms that they were good for upto 21 orgasms (my rough translation of their slogan ‘1 Tüte à 7 Stück entspricht bis zu 21 Orgasmen‘).

 Venus and Mars discussing contraception while Vulcan sleeps Painting by Jacopo Tintoretto 1518 - 1594
Venus and Mars discussing contraception while Vulcan sleeps Painting by Jacopo Tintoretto 1518 – 1594

In addition to getting upto three orgasms per condom and being Vegan products the Einhorn contraceptives also claimed to contain traces of fairy dust. For the weight conscious they also point out how many calories are consumed during sex. Of all of these items it was the number of orgasms per condom which attracted the Düsseldorf court’s attention.

Einhorn claimed that the number of orgasms per condom was not intended to mean that a man can get three orgasms out of each item. They were working on the basis that although the man would only be expected to get one orgasm it was quite likely that his partner would also get an orgasm and in fact it is not unheard of for a lady to get two orgasms during an appropriately passionate session. This was the derivation of ‘upto 3 orgasms’ – one for the bloke and upto two for the lady.

Greek Gods Jupiter and Juno debating multiple orgams by Annibale Carracci 1597
Greek Gods Jupiter and Juno debating multiple orgasms by Annibale Carracci 1597

The competitor Fair Squared claimed that the 3 orgasm claim was both confusing and potentially dangerous. It might confuse consumers into thinking that the condom was reusable which could increase the danger of contracting sexually transmitted diseases and raise the risk of unwanted pregnancies. The Court concurred with this view and have banned Einhorn from claiming that a single condom corresponds to multiple orgasms.

Having just checked the Einhorn website (for research purposes of course) I noticed that they have now changed the ‘slogan’ of their multipack to ‘The Orgasm Pack – Well Known from its Court Room appearance‘ (another rough translation by yours truly from – ‘Das Orgasmus Paket – Bekannt aus dem Gerichtsaal‘). Clearly they take their product names very seriously having delightful sounding products like Foodporn LIMITED (bearing what looks like a picture of French fries on the packet!) and ‘Spermamonster‘. Their e-mail address also leaves something to be desired (sorry I can’t publish it because it uses words my mother doesn’t allow me to use).

For those interested the websites of the two sides in this war are embedded here under their names: Einhorn and Fair Trade. I do not endorse either product but you might be interested to compare the marketing approaches for their ‘sustainable’ condoms. For German visitors to my site (and there are many!) you can see a German report on this court case using the link here.

Make sure you carefully consider the potential of your marketing slogans for misinterpretation.

Chris Duggleby

Mars holding his spear and playing with some doves while Venus discusses how to market health products - Jacques-Louis David Painting 1822-25
Mars holding his spear and playing with some doves while Venus discusses how to market health products – Jacques-Louis David Painting 1822-25

Chris Duggleby started his scientific career studying Bacteriology, Virology and Immunology at the Manchester University Medical School. From there he went on to spend over 35 in the chemicals and oil industries which included setting up a polymers research and development group in Geneva, Switzerland for a major international chemicals company. Following an MBA from Warwick University he went on to lead a number of international manufacturing and marketing operations in the Chemicals, Plastics and Oil industries. His work involved living and working in Europe, Asia, the USA, the Middle East, and Russia. More recently he was invited to take on a senior leadership position in the Audit Department of the BP International Oil Group. Here he used his global change and risk management experience to help the group reshape its management structures and processes following a major environmental disaster in the Gulf of Mexico. He has now retired to focus on writing about risk management and producing music in his studios near London, in the Alps and Cape Town. If you are interested in risk management check out his RiskTuition.com or BizChangers.com (management of change) sites.

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports on similar subjects.

Just click on the titles below:

…starting with some fun reports…

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’ and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

4th March 2015: Hamburg Reeperbahn (St. Pauli): Germans install walls that urinate on passers-by

19th April 2014: German Police Catch Hedgehogs Testing Home Made Crash Helmets in Saarbrücken

17th April 2014: Niche On-line Dating Services (Specialities: Herpes, Thrush and Genital Warts)

18th March 2014: Germany and Finland Joint Investigation: New Case of Sexual Cannibalism Including Self-mutilation (Castration) During Intercourse.

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

…and here’s some more serious stuff…

25th October 2015: Health Risks: Food allergy prevention – Latest research ‘feed infants early with allergenic food

17th October 2015: Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements help cancer cells become malignant – latest research from Texas

31st May 2015: German Concern about Potentially Carcinogenic Aromatic Hydrocarbons in Cosmetics  

11th May 2014: Product Development Risk: New Air Conditioning Coolant Gas Produces Carbonyl Difluoride (Highly Toxic – Related to WW1 Gas Phosgene) in Vehicle Fires

16th April 2014: Ethical Pricing: Same Drug – For Leukaemia 21 Euro(Now Withdrawn) – For Multiple Sclerosis 888 Euro

6th April 2014: Product Quality Risk: Shoes Sold On-line By Zalando Recalled Due To Chromium 6 Contamination – Known Allergen And Carcinogen

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine – The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

Feed Infants Early With Allergens

Advice on what to do about feeding potentially allergenic food to infants has in the past been variable with many parents simply avoiding to feed their babies with ‘suspect’ foodstuffs (the most common causes of food allergies are: cow’s milk, eggs, peanuts, tree nuts, soy, wheat, fish and shellfish). The latest research from the University of Manitoba, Winnipeg, contradicts this approach with the authors recommending that, in order to prevent allergies developing, infants should be introduced to a broad range of foodstuffs from the age of 4 months.

While you read the following article why not listen to my e-baroque compositions – just click on the box below:

or if techno music is more your cup of tea here are my techno/ambient compositions:

I hope you find the article below interesting…please visit chrisduggleby.com again.

Abrams and Becker recommend early exposure for food allergens may be beneficial
Abrams and Becker recommend early exposure for food allergens may be beneficial

I remember from my immunology studies many years ago in the Manchester University Medical School that if the human immune system was introduced to sufficient dosage of an allergen (something that causes an allergic reaction) very early in life the body may recognise that substance as ‘non-dangerous’. It becomes tolerant or desensitised. As a result later encounters with the same substance did not develop a full blown allergic reaction. The body’s response is quite different when, later in life, bacteria and viruses enter the body for the first time – these are normally recognised as dangerous and stimulate the white blood cells and antibodies to develop a proper defensive reaction. Vaccines can be used to prime the body against these harmful bugs thus accelerating and enhancing this full blown defensive response.

The immune system is complex and can sometimes provide researchers with unexpected results. For example in 1989 Erika von Mutius an epidemiologist at Munich University carried out asthma research by comparing residents in the former East German communist states with their counterparts in West Germany. Considering the amount of pollution in East Germany, the lower general levels of cleanliness (fewer vacuum cleaners!) and the tendency to offload infants as early as possible into State run kindergartens she expected to find a much higher rate of asthma and other similar allergic conditions like hay fever in the former communist states. In fact the opposite was true – the ‘clean’ West German States had much higher rates of asthma and hay fever. It looked as though the early exposure to ‘dirt’ in the east (like faeces from communist dust mites) was helping the infants to become desensitised and thereby prevent the allergic reactions that were more common in the west. Now living conditions in the east have improved guess what has happened to the allergy rates – perhaps vacuum cleaners cause allergies!

This week’s publication of research into food allergies from Canada appears to be following this trend of throwing out the previously assumed ‘wisdom’. In the past babies considered to be at a high risk of developing food allergies were recommended to avoid potentially allergenic foods until 12 to 36 months of age. The new research by Ellisa Abrams and Allan Becker, at the Department of Pediatric Allergy and Clinical Immunology in the University of Manitoba, contradicts this and indicates a much earlier exposure to these allergens is beneficial – starting as early as 4 to 6 months of age. They also concluded that: “Once highly allergenic foods are introduced, regular exposure is important for maintenance of tolerance — children should eat these foods on a regular basis.”

Abrams and Becker suggest that if the new food tastes strange persevere for a few days
Abrams and Becker suggest that if the new food tastes strange persevere for a few days

Their findings point to a recent randomized controlled trial known as the LEAP (Learning Early About Peanut) study. This concluded that giving peanuts early, rather than late, to children at high risk of peanut allergy reduced the incidence of the food allergy by 80%. Following on from this study the American Academy of Allergy Asthma and Immunology (AAAAI) now advises that high-risk infants should be introduced to peanuts between 4-11 months of age (subject to evaluation from their allergy specialist).

In addition some mothers previously avoided eating potential allergens during pregnancy and breast feeding. The new advice does not support this ‘avoidance’ diet approach. The American Academy of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology now recommends:

  1. Introduce a new food every 3 to 5 days in an age-appropriate manner (e.g., prepared in such a way as to avoid the risk of choking).
  2. Start with grains, yellow and orange vegetables and fruit.
  3. Introduce one of the potentially allergenic foods, if well tolerated, in small amounts (e.g., cow’s milk, soy, eggs)
  4. Introduce highly allergenic foods at home.
  5. Increase the quantity of food over several days.
New advice recommends against breastfeeding mothers following an allergen avoidance diet
New advice recommends against breastfeeding mothers following an allergen avoidance diet

Drs. Abrams and Becker explained: 
”If parents ask how to prevent allergy in their children, our current advice is to introduce the allergenic foods at 4-6 months of age. Once highly allergenic foods are introduced, regular exposure is important for maintenance of tolerance – children should eat these foods on a regular basis.” In other words if the child appears not to initially like the new food you should persevere – it can take a while for the child to become accustomed to the new taste. In other words the desensitisation of the immune system requires a sufficient, sustained dosage of the allergen for the allergy ‘prevention’ to become effective.

As with all medical developments it is important to always have the most recent and comprehensive research before making important decisions. Sadly there has been quite an industry that has been built up by exploiting the fears of parents for their children’s well being. For example the marketing of IgG tests which ‘identify everything your child is allergic to‘ feeds on this fear. These tests identify immunoglobulins (Ig or antibodies) that the body has developed simply in response to contact with a substance – it does not mean that these substances will actually cause a full blown hypersensitivity or anaphylactic reaction. Sadly some parents take these results as being a ‘don’t eat under any circumstances’ list. Based on this latest research they could be doing their children more harm than good.

In an attempt to present dangerous allergic reaction risks in context Robert Boyle at Imperial College recently provided some statistics in the scientific journal Clinical and Experimental Allergy. The incidence of fatal food anaphylaxis in people with food allergies is 1.81 deaths per million (rising to 3.25 in children). This is about one tenth of the risk in the general population of accidental death (if you would like to see more of Dr Boyle’s statistics please visit the link here). The original article by Drs. Abrams and Becker can be found here.

A couple of happy feeders taking a post lunch nap
A couple of happy feeders taking a post lunch nap

If you would like to read another report I have prepared on skin allergies why not take a look at the following (apologies for the gruesome ‘human guinea pig’ pictures of yours truly):

Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

In addition if you are interested in recent research into how multivitamins and antioxidants may be helping cancers to become malignant the following may be worth a read:

Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements help cancer cells become malignant – latest research from Texas

Stay healthy!

Chris Duggleby

As with all medical issues you should always consult with your family’s medical practitioner if you have any concerns about potential allergy problems.

Chris Duggleby started his scientific career studying Bacteriology, Virology and Immunology at the Manchester University Medical School. From there he went on to spend over 35 in the chemicals and oil industries which included setting up a polymers research and development group in Geneva, Switzerland for a major international chemicals company. Following an MBA from Warwick University he went on to lead a number of international manufacturing and marketing operations in the Chemicals, Plastics and Oil industries. His work involved living and working in Europe, Asia, the USA, the Middle East, and Russia. More recently he was invited to take on a senior leadership position in the Audit Department of the BP International Oil Group. Here he used his global change and risk management experience to help the group reshape its management structures and processes following a major environmental disaster in the Gulf of Mexico. He has now retired to focus on writing about risk management and producing music in his studios near London, in the Alps and Cape Town. If you are interested in risk management check out his RiskTuition.com or BizChangers.com (management of change) sites.

If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports on similar subjects.

Just click on the titles below:

17th October 2015: Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements help cancer cells become malignant – latest research from Texas

31st May 2015: German Concern about Potentially Carcinogenic Aromatic Hydrocarbons in Cosmetics  

11th May 2014: Product Development Risk: New Air Conditioning Coolant Gas Produces Carbonyl Difluoride (Highly Toxic – Related to WW1 Gas Phosgene) in Vehicle Fires

16th April 2014: Ethical Pricing: Same Drug – For Leukaemia 21 Euro(Now Withdrawn) – For Multiple Sclerosis 888 Euro

6th April 2014: Product Quality Risk: Shoes Sold On-line By Zalando Recalled Due To Chromium 6 Contamination – Known Allergen And Carcinogen

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine – The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’ and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

Health Risk: Vitamin and antioxidant supplements feed and encourage cancer cells – latest research from Texas

Many people take vitamin or antioxidant supplements in the hope that these will improve their chances of surviving cancer. Early research with regard to the benefits of such dietary supplements were at best mixed. There is now growing scientific evidence that such supplements, rather than helping us to fight cancer, actually benefit the cancer cells’ ability to successfully metastasise and thereby become malignant.

While you read why not listen to my album ‘Electro Baroque‘ (all tracks are also available on iTunes using the link here)? Classical music using modern instruments:

or if you prefer to listen to my electro/techno album ‘Studio Valiumm‘ here are the videos (also on iTunes using the link here):

More info about my music is at the dedicated website www.TRANSFORMATES.com

Commercially available multivitamin tablets
Commercially available multivitamin tablets

Research published this week in the respected scientific journal Nature describes how the condition of ‘oxidative stress‘ prevents cancer cells from metastasising. This is the condition where they break off from the original tumour and move to other parts of the body to cause new tumorous growths – in other words the cancer becomes malignant. This oxidative stress can be overcome through the application of antioxidants like those used in body-building and vitamin supplements.

Typical Antioxidant Glutathione produced by living organisms
Typical Antioxidant Glutathione produced by living organisms

This research therefore strongly reinforces the view that antioxidant and vitamin supplements can actually promote the development of malignant tumours. Until now such supplements have actually been prescribed to cancer patients in the belief that they can help the body in its defence against cancer. If these research results are confirmed physicians will need to reassess the use of such supplements in the therapy of cancer and other diseases like HIV. Likewise the everyday use of vitamin and antioxidant supplements by millions of people in the hope that they improve health may be wrong. For those of us already benefiting from a normal healthy diet such supplements may actually be doing more harm than good.

As with all health related research it is important to duplicate the results and ensure they are applicable in all relevant circumstances. However the team around Sean Morrison, director of the Children’s Medical Center Research Institute at University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center, is well respected. He explained “The idea that antioxidants are good for you has been so strong that there have been clinical trials done in which cancer patients were administered antioxidants….. Some of those trials had to be stopped because the patients getting the antioxidants were dying faster. Our data suggest the reason for this: cancer cells benefit more from antioxidants than normal cells do.

Vitamin C Antioxidant L ascorbic acid
Vitamin C Antioxidant L ascorbic acid

The studies were conducted in specialized mice that had been transplanted with melanoma (skin cancer) cells from patients. Earlier studies have shown that the metastasis of melanoma cells in these mice is predictive of their metastasis in human patients. Metastasis, the process by which cancer cells spread from their initial site to other regions in the body, leads to the death of most cancer patients. Sean Morrison’s team found that when antioxidants were administered to the mice, the cancer spread more quickly than in mice that did not get antioxidants.

The Texas research now needs to be tested in people, however the team has already suggested that cancer should be treated with additives that promote oxidation (pro-oxidants rather than antioxidants) and that cancer patients should refrain from supplementing their diet with large doses of antioxidants (more details available in the original article in Nature using the link here).

Clearly more research needs to be carried out in this area but this is not the first time that the benefits of supplements have been questioned. In 2012 E.E. Martinez and co-workers at Vanderbilt University performing large-scale cancer prevention trials with Selenium (antioxidant) and Vitamin E showed that the antioxidants failed to prevent, and in some cases promoted, prostate cancer formation in men without a history of the disease (more details in their original publication here).

Similarly in 2014 Martin Bergo and coworkers published research results showing that antioxidants (Vitamin E and N-acetycysteine) accelerated lung cancer in mice. Using doses similar to those found in human multivitamin pills they found that those mice that had ingested the antioxidants developed tumours that were three times bigger than control mice and they died twice as fast (more details of this Gothenburg University Team’s research in their original publication here).

Clearly these findings will not be greeted enthusiastically by those drugs companies that have been encouraging millions of customers to prophylactically take multivitamin and antioxidant suppliments. However, as the body of scientific evidence builds, the future of such supplements may be questionable. One thing however has not changed by this research – a balanced diet including all the natural vitamins and elements provided by unprocessed natural foods is still best health option on offer (and take it from me – it can be cheap!).

Chris Duggleby.

Typical vitamin supplements
Typical vitamin supplements

Chris Duggleby started his scientific career studying Bacteriology, Virology and Immunology at the Manchester University Medical School. From there he went on to spend over 35 in the chemicals and oil industries which included setting up a polymers research and development group in Geneva, Switzerland for a major international chemicals company. Following an MBA from Warwick University he went on to lead a number of international manufacturing and marketing operations in the Chemicals, Plastics and Oil industries. His work involved living and working in Europe, Asia, the USA, the Middle East, and Russia. More recently he was invited to take on a senior leadership position in the Audit Department of the BP International Oil Group. Here he used his global change and risk management experience to help the group reshape its management structures and processes following a major environmental disaster in the Gulf of Mexico. He has now retired to focus on writing about risk management and producing music in his studios near London, in the Alps and Cape Town. If you are interested in risk management check out his RiskTuition.com or BizChangers.com (management of change) sites.

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My recent album ‘Baroque Transformation‘ is now available to download (iTunes link is here). You can find out more from Transformates.com (link here). To hear the tracks/see the videos here’s my YouTube Electro Baroque playlist:

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If you found this article interesting please consider taking a look at some of my other recent reports on similar subjects.

Just click on the titles below:

26th July 2015: Poison in your Washing Machine: Allergic Contact Dermatitis from Laundry Detergents, Softeners, Conditioners and Whiteners

31st May 2015: German Concern about Potentially Carcinogenic Aromatic Hydrocarbons in Cosmetics  

11th May 2014: Product Development Risk: New Air Conditioning Coolant Gas Produces Carbonyl Difluoride (Highly Toxic – Related to WW1 Gas Phosgene) in Vehicle Fires

16th April 2014: Ethical Pricing: Same Drug – For Leukaemia 21 Euro(Now Withdrawn) – For Multiple Sclerosis 888 Euro

6th April 2014: Product Quality Risk: Shoes Sold On-line By Zalando Recalled Due To Chromium 6 Contamination – Known Allergen And Carcinogen

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine – The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen

21st June 2015: Bio-undies: Guilt free Passion with ‘Easy Emma’ and ‘Loose Harry’and Getting Rid of Garden Snails with Rent-a-Duck

You can also find some of my more humorous reports in the Alpine Press section of this site using the link here.

Now prepare for an uplifting experience! 

Transformation, Risk & Lifestyle