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This week I have decided that the blog entry should have a romantic flavour and there are two recent events that have reinforced my view that love is alive and kicking both in the Southern Hemisphere and also here ‘up North’.

Let’s start with the sunny end. Recently, Lorraine and Ian, the couple who live in the Villa next to my pad in Cape Town, decided to get married. Sadly because of an urgent assignment in another country with the RiskBusters I was unable to attend the wedding ceremony. I had to leave South Africa just as it was starting.

So, in order to participate ‘in spirit’ the love birds asked me if I would help them to put together some photos for the invitations. So the three of us trundled off down to Llandudno beach, camera in hand, and captured some sun and passion (despite getting sand into those inconvenient, itchy places).

This means that although I couldn’t be physically at the ceremony, I was involved indirectly. In fact I hear from the now happily married couple that they also decided to turn some of the photos into table mats. This means I can also join in whenever they have a romantic meal, looking into each other’s eyes, and perhaps inadvertently dribbling onto my lovely artwork!

Now, the second romantic event for this week’s blog was prompted when I turned up at the Car hire counter upon arrival at my usual alpine airport. Helga, the friendly lady at the counter, could hardly control her enthusiasm. “Mr Dog-I’ll-buy how luverly to experience your person coming again: I wud like to give you somezing extra special in der VIP carpark: Do you like Italian sports cars?”

I felt my pulse rising in anticipation but tried to stay cool: “Well only if they are red” I lied.

“Null Problemo! Der roof is red but if you don’t like it you can pull the nob and get off with it”

Even before I got to the car I had already sent a text to my partner, Pink Lips, who was waiting for me in the apartment: “Get your head scarf out, tomorrow we are going out in my Italian Sports Convertible”. I couldn’t wait to see what Helga wanted to give me in the VIP car park. Was it a Maserati GranCabrio or perhaps a Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder.

Next day Pink Lips was up at the crack of dawn, dressed in a bright red ribbon for her trip in the convertible. Even our dog RISKKO was already sitting in his basket with his tail wagging. So we waited for the rain to stop and then jumped into the masterpiece of Italian style and engineering craftsmanship. I hadn’t realised that the Fiat 500 was also available as a convertible.

By the time we got to the supermarket the rain had almost stopped, so while I was doing the shopping Pink Lips and RISKKO tried to work out how to get the roof down. Fortunately I had not left a can opener in the car.

I returned to the car with this weekend’s provisions and found that the two of them had succeeded in getting the roof down. They were showing off to the other shoppers in the supermarket car park and having a cuddle in their shiny brand new Italian convertible!

Sadly it started to rain again so we had to put the roof up and return home. Pink Lips asked me whether the Car Hire lady knew I was from Yorkshire – she had noticed the fuel gauge on my ‘sports’ car had hardly moved since I picked it up. We managed to get through a whole weekend of alpine touring and had only consumed about 14 litres of fuel. I explained it probably had something to do with the aerodynamic shape. I also pointed out that in Yorkshire we would probably add in a few design improvements like bigger side pockets for the ferrets (this would make it into a true ‘sports’ car). I would also have added a couple of straps at the front so it could be fastened onto the Donkey. This would improve the fuel consumption even further. Italian style and Yorkshire frugality!

At this point RISKKO decided to be sick in his basket. Time to go home.

If you haven’t seen their latest video yet just type RISKKO into You Tube or try this following link! Please note that some of the less respectable videos you might come across when you type Pink Lips into the search engine are not mine.

Have a romantic week!

Chris Duggleby

If you found this review interesting you may also find some of my other recent articles worth checking out. To view these simply click over the titles below:

31st March 2014: Women In the Army: Germany – Problems with Sexual Harassment,Scandinavian Solution ….Sleeping Together

18th March 2014: Germany and Finland Joint Investigation: New Case of Sexual Cannibalism Including Self-mutilation (Castration) During Intercourse.

7th March 2014: Invasive Alien Species (IAS) Discovered in France – Potential for European Ecosystem Disaster

4th March 2014: 30,000 Year old giant virus found in the Siberian Permafrost and ‘resurrected’ – it is still infectious!

2nd March 2014: Wolves are better at learning from their ‘pals’ than dogs.Through domestication dogs have lost a capability that is key to success in the wild.

24th February 2014: NAZI Research into the use of Mosquitoes as Biological Weapons to Infect Allied Troops with Malaria.

24th February 2014: Ant Wars: Crazy Ants deploy Chemical Warfare against Poisonous Fire Ants and their Amphibious Craft.

9th March 2013: Insects getting hooked on psychoactive drugs – How plants take advantage of bees by giving them a caffeine buzz.

29th December 2012: Spreading diarrhea and vomit through the washing machine – The Norovirus propagator in our kitchen. 

28th December 2012: If you want to suck on my worm you had better whistle my song! 

23rd December 2012: Lower Saxony puts naked winter sports event on ice for safety reasons following massive popularity of undressed ladies on sledges and fears of over exposure. 

22nd December 2012: German tax authorities require lorry drivers to keep a toilet log-book(“LKV Fiscal Bog Log”).

25th August 2012: Sex Tax declared a success by Bonn – once again Germany leads the way in fiscal innovation with high-tech self-service sex tax collection system.

18th August 2012: Polar Bear dies of Encephalitis after catching Herpes from a Zebra in Wuppertal Zoo near Düsseldorf.

18th August 2012: How Bavarians and Austrians use their middle finger – Fingerhakeln: a men-only sport (did Arnold Schwarzenegger start training this way?).

11th August 2012: Do you have killer rats/mice in your cellar? Over 2000 people attacked in Germany so far this year (Hantavirus Infections at record levels).

28th July 2012: Naked Night Swimming in the Lakes Around Munich (costumes and towels are for wimps!)

28th July 2012: Naked In-line Skating in Dachau (Is this Germany’s Preparation for a new Olympic Event? – Watch out Beach Volleyball!)

7th July 2012: Sexual Equality in the Black Forest town of Triberg: Men only parking spaces.

(…..and the link to the Pink Lips You Tube video is here!)

If you find these articles interesting why not visit the contents list of my Alpine Press page and take a look at some of the other reviews, just click on the link here. Alternatively why not get free updates of new articles by subscribing to my RSS feed using this link. This will send the latest updates direct to your browser and you can read them at your leisure by looking under the ‘feeds’ section of your browser favourites.